Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

knightblade890

Search for a member

knightblade890

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 893
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

knightblade890's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

knightblade890's favorite FMLs

Today, I Was Getting Intimate With Mah Girlfriend. She Pulled Down Mah Trousers, Saw Mah Poke-ball Boxers, An Absolutely Lost It. I Had To Lie Next To Her In Bed 4 The Next 10 Minutes Hearing Her Howl With Laughter While Crying ( Dickachu, I Choose You! ) FML

#20711208
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57207) - you deserved it (66117)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today... My Little Sister Was Scared To Sleep Alone... So My Parents Made Her Sleep In Bed With Me. I Barely Slept... Due To The Utter Terror Of Waking Up To Her Chanting Into My Ear In A Low Whisper... "This Is Where U Die... This Is Where U Die..." FML

#20709788
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50947) - you deserved it (3477)

On 06/06/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Isle of Man

TODAY , MA WIFE UTTERED TE SOUL-CRUSING WORDS , "BUT WE'RE MARRIED NOW,Y WOULD WE AVE SEX?" FML

#20706140
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86296) - you deserved it (8228)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by ._. (man) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today,hile sexting mah grlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30857) - you deserved it (65771)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today... I had to eat up a few specks of toilet paper to avoid spoiling "the moment" with mah grlfriend. FML

#20692661
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64941) - you deserved it (14360)

On 05/29/2013 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" an then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

#20680679
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56176) - you deserved it (4374)

On 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I confrontd mah boss to fine out why I was denid a promotion that she promisd to me. Her response? "You should know by now I'm a liar. Not mah fault if you believe the things I say." FML

#20680205
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36680) - you deserved it (3347)

On 05/22/2013 at 5:48pm - work - by Snurkles McGee (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that my wife is having an affair with the same guy my ex-wife left me for. FML

#20645479
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90199) - you deserved it (5650)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Ireland (Donegal)

Today I walkd into ta living room to find ma 11-yaar-old daugtar about to kiss ar ( not ma boyfriand ) on ta lips. Wan I askd wat sa tougt sa was doing sa paald a piaca of scotc tapa off ar lips and said ( It's okay! Wa'ra using protaction. ) FML

#20640565
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67479) - you deserved it (9932)

On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Yesterday, I walked in on my looool brother giving his best friend a hand-job. I can't unsee this. FML

2day mah grandson visitd me, an askd if I had any pictures of myself fromhen I was a little girl !! I happily lookd for a few photos to give him, askinghat had piqud his curiosity !! He replid that he wantd some for looool a presentation he's doing on the Middle Ages !! FML

#20555821
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33401) - you deserved it (2801) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/22/2013 at 9:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Lorraine)

yesterday my brother accidentally hit me in the throat. After I stoppd coughing, choking, and feeling like I was going to die, he cummd back into my room, quietly said "I know your weakness," and left. FML

#20518354
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30451) - you deserved it (2982)

On 02/23/2013 at 1:28am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Yesterday , I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market an buy a copy of 50 Shade of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laughhile ringing me up. FML

#20516035
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39313) - you deserved it (10375)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, for te second time tis week, I was asked to stop putting on suc an obviously fake "Britis" accent!! I am Britis and ave lived ere all ma life!! mega FML

#20513499
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33910) - you deserved it (2714)

On 02/19/2013 at 1:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

yesterday while I was in the shower boyfriend decided to join me. We were really getting into it and he attempted to lift me up. Not only did I let out a massive fart he slipped and fell on top of me. He won't stop laughing. FML

#20513159
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43131) - you deserved it (9402)

On 02/19/2013 at 3:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous -



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: