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klwmommy1223

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klwmommy1223
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 6 May 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 59
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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klwmommy1223's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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klwmommy1223's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML

#21025946
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48347) - you deserved it (29462)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend's idea of foreplay was to offer to make lunch, leave the room for a few minutes, then come back with no clothes on and offer me a "cockmeat sandwich". FML

#20982904
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45802) - you deserved it (7652)

On 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm - intimacy - by fuckadaisical (woman) - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63179) - you deserved it (17993)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my social teacher thought it would be a great idea to have a casual debate about Margaret Thatcher and her legacy. Within 10 minutes, the entire class was yelling, screaming, throwing stuff at each other. I got hit in the face with a binder. FML

#20584117
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34701) - you deserved it (3316)

On 04/10/2013 at 8:40pm - misc - by great idea - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was taking a patient's blood pressure, and listening for his pulse with my stethoscope. I couldn't hear anything, so I adjusted the cuff and tried again. Still no pulse. He pointed out that my stethoscope was the wrong way around and sneered, "You been smokin' the reefer, boy?" FML

#20535043
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11634) - you deserved it (29751)

On 03/07/2013 at 7:35pm - work - by no sir I have not (man) - United States

Today, I went to get a tattoo. I decided on getting my four month daughter's name tattooed on my upper arm. I went home to show my wife. She broke down and told me that I'm most likely not the father. It's a toss-up between her co-worker, the guy who does our lawn, several strangers and me. FML

#14605764
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47984) - you deserved it (3648)

On 01/16/2011 at 9:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I borrowed a van to move some of my furniture. I wasn't used to the brakes so when I stopped at a red light, I pretty much ended up in the cross walk. Suddenly I heard a loud thud at the side of the van. I turned to see what idiot would walk into a van. It was a blind man. FML

#174723
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12658) - you deserved it (44218)

On 03/01/2009 at 8:09pm - misc - by jazojigga (man) - United States (California)



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