kittycat1597

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Offline (the 01/31/2015 at 11:03pm)

kittycat1597

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kittycat1597
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2576
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About kittycat1597 : hi my names jessica im lesbian and deathly afraid of moths. I'm a professional dancer also

kittycat1597's page activity

Visits<b>Blizzicus</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 10:47pm<b>angrykid11</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 1:25am<b>MrConfusion</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 11:34pm<b>cidcarrera</b> - the 06/10/2016 at 5:38pm<b>YDISM</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 2:31pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 3:44am<b>Teyros</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 4:52pm<b>captain_hero89</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 11:52pm<b>IAm123</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 2:58am<b>d3vil666</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 5:43am<b>joeyl2008</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 5:00pm<b>lui_pg</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 11:07pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 11:59am<b>emmarawr17</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 8:24am<b>wil1029</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 10:53am<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 10:57am<b>MahmoudElserafi</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 7:09am<b>ninjuh_wingman</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 4:59pm

Fucked!<b>najnick</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 11:33am<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 10:01pm

kittycat1597's FML badges

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kittycat1597's favorite FMLs

Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML

by TheVirginJenny / 10/06/2012 at 8:05pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, a classmate came up to me, quickly shoved a dollar bill down my shirt, threw her arms around me and told me to pretend I was her boyfriend to avoid some other guy. Sad thing is, this is the first girl I've hugged in ages. FML

by nonfreehugs / 10/04/2012 at 1:09am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I realized I might lose my job because some asshole customer complained about me to my district manager. His complaint? Girls can't work at video game stores. My DM agreed. FML

by GamerTag / 10/02/2012 at 9:11am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2012 at 12:37am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2012 at 12:51pm / United States / Animals

Today, I was at a Chinese buffet, and I got a fortune cookie. I opened it, and it said, "The love of your life is sitting across from you". The only thing across from me was an empty chair. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2012 at 4:13pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I tried to stand by my toaster and train myself to not jump when it popped up. Not only did I jump, I also knocked the toaster off the counter and onto my toes. FML

by purplexangel / 08/02/2012 at 1:32pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I burned my nose. How? I tried sniffing a lit candle. FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2012 at 1:44am / United States / Health

Today, I wanted to prank my roommate. So, I thought it would be funny to take all the toilet paper out of our bathroom. She thought it would be funny to wipe with my cashmere sweater. FML

by Karmaisabitch / 05/18/2012 at 2:07am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I fell into a hole. And by hole, I mean a sewer. FML

by Anonymous / 05/16/2012 at 6:45am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I started the job of my dreams. Our first marketing meeting was an in-depth analysis of the phrase, "Haters gonna hate, potatoes gonna potate". I have a 5 year contract. FML

by picklet / 05/12/2012 at 10:36am / Malaysia (Negeri Sembilan) / Work

Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML

by wtf is wrong with my country / 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up, got up, and felt something crunchy under my feet. My son thought it would be funny if he spread cat litter all around the house. Used cat litter. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2012 at 11:22am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML

by phoneless / 04/17/2012 at 3:23pm / Jordan / Miscellaneous

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous