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kittenmeownyan

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kittenmeownyan

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1227
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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Visits<b>Valcannos</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 3:35pm<b>Lct1196</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 7:55pm<b>LordGoober</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 7:53am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 10:15am<b>soccerforlife_27</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 8:27pm<b>dk1991</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 1:58pm<b>rouslov</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 1:23am<b>LeeB</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 5:02pm<b>rabechan</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 8:55pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 8:15pm<b>MCRaddict15</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 1:33am<b>Damned_Architect</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 7:15am<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 3:25am<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/10/2013 at 11:40am<b>chargers2588</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 2:40pm<b>taylor27gang</b> - the 07/03/2013 at 10:15pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 9:37pm<b>butthole321</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 11:38pm

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kittenmeownyan's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML

#9407867
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35390) - you deserved it (5985)

On 03/26/2010 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by Haley. - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was walking down the street when I heard a loud splashing noise to my right. I looked over only to see a woman not squatting but bending over, spreading her cheeks, peeing a horse-sized amount of pee. I can't un-see this. FML

#9143571
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37752) - you deserved it (3001)

On 03/16/2010 at 9:34pm - misc - by disturbed (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was in my room, in my briefs and texting my girlfriend. Suddenly, I got a massive erection and I decided to take a picture to send her. As soon as my camera phone clicked, my mom walked in. You can see my mom in the picture screaming at me. FML

#8861010
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9053) - you deserved it (26506)

On 03/06/2010 at 1:10am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I caught my dog attempting to shit on the carpet. When I saw him, I screamed. Startled, he ran around the house, continuing to take his shit. Now, I don't have to clean up a nice pile, I get to go on a scavenger hunt and find all of the scattered turds. FML

#8837524
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20623) - you deserved it (11316)

On 03/05/2010 at 12:17am - animals - by Catois (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML

#8158295
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30295) - you deserved it (2306)

On 02/12/2010 at 2:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my pet hedgehog thought it would be funny to roll around in the kitty litter. It was like washing a poopy cactus. FML

Today, while dining at a restaurant I heard a women choking. I immediately ran to her, wrapped my arms around her and started giving her abdominal thrusts. She freed herself and slapped me. Turns out she wasn't choking, she was just laughing. FML

#6546053
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13652) - you deserved it (29384)

On 12/01/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by helper (man) - Costa Rica (Heredia)

Today, I was working at a children's play centre, and my stomach was twisting and turning. Thinking no one was around, I let out a small fart, only to turn and see a little girl running to her mom yelling, "Mommy-mommy that lady just farted and it sounded like daddy!" FML

#6441579
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11971) - you deserved it (23475)

On 11/25/2009 at 2:36am - kids - by n/a - United States

Today, I wore my kilt to the university I attend. Getting tired of the stares which I was receiving, I yelled "It's cause its too big to fit in my pants". As soon as the words left my mouth, a gust of wind came and blew my kilt up around my waist, revealing that my previous claim was untrue. FML

#6053376
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9659) - you deserved it (50534)

On 10/29/2009 at 10:31am - misc - by TrueScotsman (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I thought it would be fun to tease my dog by standing above her and hitting each of her paws repeatedly. My dog thought it would be fun to jump up and bite at my chest whilst I wasn't wearing a shirt. I just spent four hours in hospital getting my nipple sewn back on. FML

#5289656
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11488) - you deserved it (80393)

On 09/16/2009 at 9:24am - animals - by nipped (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML

#4361327
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49696) - you deserved it (6437)

On 08/07/2009 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by piratequeen (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML

#3484293
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53117) - you deserved it (23662)

On 07/04/2009 at 5:07pm - love - by DutchOven (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was cashiering at a grocery store when an elderly woman came through my line buying prune juice. She then whispered to me that last time she bought it, she "blew up her toilet". FML

#3225149
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37090) - you deserved it (2386)

On 06/26/2009 at 12:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to mow the lawn with a weedwacker because it rained a lot the past week and the push mower was broken. I started "mowing", and forgetting that I am mowing where the dogs go to the restroom, I absent-mindedly weedwack over dog poop. Which got flung into my face. FML

#1775863
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37049) - you deserved it (23687)

On 05/09/2009 at 11:50am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)



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