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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Up and coming moderator
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Today, as my girlfriend was dropping me home, our goodbye kiss got kind of heavy. Still parked in my drive, we had fast, frenzied sex. After, we realised that she had never put the hand brake on and that we had rolled down my drive, blocking my dad who was patiently waiting to pull in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10622) - you deserved it (41105)
Today, I was taking a serious shit when the light bulb burned out. I am terrified of the dark and began wailing and crying. My mom had to pick the lock and get me out. I'm a 17 year old guy and captain of the Varsity football team. My little brother recorded it and plans on showing everyone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19259) - you deserved it (46646)
On 08/07/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by scaredshitless (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, a very good platonic friend of mine said he had a question to ask me. Jokingly, I threw my arms around his neck and said 'Oh yes, yes, a thousand times yes!' When I sat back down, I saw tears in his eyes, and he said 'You've made me the happiest man alive' as he pulled a small box out of his coat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20740) - you deserved it (74494)
On 08/06/2009 at 5:25pm - love - by dundundadumb (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, after being supportive for nearly a year, my brother finally came out of the closet and introduced the family to his new boyfriend. His new boyfriend happens to be my ex-boyfriend. Guess I know why that didn't work out now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42052) - you deserved it (3042)
On 08/06/2009 at 4:01pm - misc - by tryingnottocare (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I quit my job after two years. Now I have my crazy boss sitting out in front of my house, telling me she wants to work things out. She has been there all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38306) - you deserved it (2709)
On 08/03/2009 at 1:16pm - work - by Azcrazy (man) - United States
Today, I was riding my motorcycle. Suddenly, I saw my cheating ex-wife walking down the road. As a sign of anger, I spat my gum towards her. I forgot that my helmet's visor was still down, so when I spat, the gum stuck against it. I was temporarily blinded and I crashed into the bushes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9001) - you deserved it (52097)
On 07/29/2009 at 8:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I went to a funeral for my coworker's father. While there, my dad's cell phone rang and he left to answer it. I turned to my brother and said, "I can't believe he brought his cell phone!" He whispered, "I can't believe he's got coverage. This is a dead zone!" I laughed loudly. At a funeral. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17855) - you deserved it (41595)
On 07/26/2009 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version
Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him I had none, he yelled angrily "who comes to this city without money?" I replied "apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39047) - you deserved it (20648)
On 07/25/2009 at 12:39pm - money - by re2K5 (man) - Korea Republic of (Kyongsang-bukto)
Today, after not seeing my boyfriend for 9 months, he came to meet me at the airport. I was so excited when I first saw him that I broke into a sprint to greet him. Apparently, running through the airport looks suspicious, because a security guard tackled me. Now I have a broken nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43844) - you deserved it (5140)
On 07/19/2009 at 9:49am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my friend put a bunch of cheetos all over me at the beach while I was taking a nap. Next thing I know I'm being woken up by a bunch of seagulls attacking me. One pooped in my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36421) - you deserved it (3346)
On 07/16/2009 at 2:30am - misc - by kewlcat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was involved in a car accident. I wasn't the driver of either car. I happened to be a passerby that was hit by a falling stop sign as a car hit it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45201) - you deserved it (1707)
On 07/11/2009 at 3:43am - misc - by ttsutaoka (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was riding my bike without the seat cover on. I hit a curb wrong and the two metal rods from the skeleton of the seat went through my jeans. I went to the med clinic to then find out that I had to get stitches in my scrotum. There were no male doctors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20368) - you deserved it (40618)
On 06/28/2009 at 2:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I got a meat pie for lunch. I bit into it and felt something hard. I spat it out. It was a tooth. I checked my mouth in a panic and discovered, with mixed feelings of relief and horror, that the tooth wasn’t mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (70501) - you deserved it (2712)
On 06/13/2009 at 11:13am - misc - by Toothy_Peg (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML
I agree, your life sucks (113522) - you deserved it (6693)
On 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm - misc - by mcullen21 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I picked up my 4-year-old daughter from day care. As we're driving home, a butterfly lands on the windshield. Just as my daughter comments on how pretty the butterfly is, I turned a corner and accidentally hit the windshield wipers and smeared the pretty butterfly across the windshield. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38660) - you deserved it (8688)
On 05/29/2009 at 4:13pm - animals - by reb2632 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Friday 24 May 2013
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