About kingsgirl99 : FML!!
About kingsgirl99 : FML!!
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kingsgirl99's favorite FMLs
by missyoudad. / 08/31/2010 at 3:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
by H8TR / 08/26/2010 at 9:32am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by bbbblt / 08/15/2010 at 7:39am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy
by Zippermania9 / 08/10/2010 at 8:14pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found a pile of animal skeletons scattered in my backyard. It appears that last night, mother nature decided to rain so hard, that the graves of my childhood pets floated back up to the top, and covered half of my field. I now have to pick all of it up before my dog sees them. FML
by L.Lime05 / 08/08/2010 at 7:27pm / United States (California) / Animals
Today, my dog managed to get into our cabinet and eat an entire bag of hershey kisses. Now she is puking all over the house and outside too. When I called the vet to tell her about it, she said that it was normal, and to call her back when it was "coming out the other end." FML
by Anonymous / 03/12/2010 at 7:01am / United States (New Jersey) / Animals
by Anonymous / 03/02/2010 at 4:16pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by grossuncle / 02/25/2010 at 12:44pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
Today, I messaged my sister on Facebook chat. We always start our conversations with "HEY SLUT" or "HEY WHORE" etc. It wasn't my sister. However, her boyfriend's mom has a great first impression of me. FML
by Anon / 02/13/2010 at 9:53am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/05/2010 at 1:25am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was in the car with my 16 year old daughter. There was a guy on a fast looking motorcycle next to me at the stop light. I yelled to him to "get it up!" so that he would do a wheelie. Just before the light turned green he yelled back, "You're too old for me, but I'll get it up for her!" FML
by Anonymous / 02/05/2010 at 1:18am / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, I found a wallet belonging to some guy, it had $355 inside. Because he had his address written inside, I decided to return it hoping for a reward. I drove for 40 mins and finally got to his house during peak hour. All he did was say "oh cool". FML
by Sheggie / 01/30/2010 at 12:06am / Australia (New South Wales) / Money
Today, I was caught going on Facebook at work. I was called into my boss' office to be reprimanded, and while he was lecturing me on the importance of staying focussed and the misuse of company property, his computer beeped. It was his Facebook chat notifying him of a new message. FML
by boredatwork / 01/29/2010 at 10:33am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by emergency / 01/25/2010 at 8:32am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Intimacy
Today, while babysitting a six year old boy, he asked me if I could show him my "boobies." I said no, that wouldn't be very appropriate. Suddenly, he pulled down his pants/undies and pointed to his package while exclaiming, "Look, my penis is on again!" It was pointing RIGHT at me. FML
by Michele / 01/17/2010 at 7:32pm / United States (New York) / Kids
- Today, I woke up next to the girl I had drunk intercourse with last night. Before we got it on, I… Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. We are both virgins. After we… Today, my boyfriend told me that I moan too much when we have sex. I actually just fake my moans in…