kingsamuelcdt

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kingsamuelcdt

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 376
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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kingsamuelcdt's page activity

Visits<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 6:59pm<b>BeautyBaby099</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 7:02pm<b>urbantrashcan</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 3:47pm<b>Skylae</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 4:18pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 3:49am<b>mariepastyglue</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 1:28am<b>sammyjanette</b> - the 07/08/2012 at 10:29pm<b>awkwardaredevil</b> - the 10/25/2011 at 10:41pm<b>22jrdn55</b> - the 05/12/2011 at 6:15pm

kingsamuelcdt's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

kingsamuelcdt's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a parent-teacher conference with my 8 year old son. He'd written "Chuck Norris" as the answer for every question on his test. FML

by yobruh / 05/17/2011 at 12:54am / Kids

Today, my 12 year old son came home from school and informed me that he bought an air guitar for $20. He honestly thinks this is a good price. FML

by Whatdididowrong? / 05/10/2011 at 1:18am / Kids

Today, I came home to find that all my porn magazines have been "censored" with a black sharpie. FML

by Username / 04/21/2011 at 2:30pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

by omg / 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, my wife created a "Points Reward" system for the privilege of sex. 10 points for doing the dishes, 20 for the laundry, etc. How many points do I need before I can have sex with her? 2300. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2011 at 10:59am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my mom banned me from watching The Simpsons and Family Guy because apparently, they're part of "the Devil's plan to corrupt God's children". FML

by Jonathan / 03/18/2011 at 5:40pm / Denmark (Midtjyllen) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a call from my five-year-old son's principal, my son had pooped in the school yard then gave the teacher a ziploc bag and commanded her to pick it up. He said he was trying to imitate our dog. FML

by anonymous / 03/15/2011 at 10:05pm / Kids

Today, we had to discuss our heritage at school. When I told the class that I am German, Japanese, and of the Jewish faith, the teacher loudly laughs at the "irony." Something like this happens whenever I tell people my background. FML

by Anonymous / 03/06/2011 at 12:18am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was leaving to go over to a friend's and my parents suddenly ask if I'm gay. I reply that no, I'm bisexual. My mom then asks if I've ever made out with someone of the same sex and I say yes. She turns to my dad and says 'I told you so. You owe me $20'. My parents bet on my sexuality. FML

by Syferix / 03/18/2009 at 6:42pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I was leaving to go over to a friend's and my parents suddenly ask if I'm gay. I reply that no, I'm bisexual. My mom then asks if I've ever made out with someone of the same sex and I say yes. She turns to my dad and says 'I told you so. You owe me $20'. My parents bet on my sexuality. FML

by Syferix / 03/18/2009 at 6:42pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I was hooking up with a guy for the first time and he told me I was in luck. When I asked why he replied, "I like little boobs." FML

by miapapaya / 02/15/2009 at 4:44pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy