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king_kazma

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king_kazma

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 30 September 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8998
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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king_kazma's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of king_kazma's badges

king_kazma's favorite FMLs

Today, I managed to take an entire shower without realizing my socks were on. I washed my feet. FML

#21382179
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14836) - you deserved it (6026)

On 03/26/2015 at 11:28pm - misc - by comfort_ - United States (Georgia)

Today, my school had to make an official announcement that students were not permitted to go home due to Zayn Malik leaving One Direction because so many girls were claiming they couldn't focus on school with such a dramatic event occurring. FML

#21381783
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30681) - you deserved it (2533)

On 03/26/2015 at 9:20am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, three of my dipshit coworkers kept whining all day about Zayne Malik leaving One Direction, how devastating it is, and what it means for their future. As a pacifist, I've never had to struggle so hard to not beat the piss out of people and hurl their broken remains out a window. FML

#21381305
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26267) - you deserved it (3886)

On 03/25/2015 at 3:00pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was doing homework and I had my leg bent in a funny position. When I stood up, my hip dislocated. It was the most painful thing I've ever experienced. When people ask me what happened, I have to say I dislocated my hip doing calculus. FML

#21381072
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24795) - you deserved it (2564)

On 03/25/2015 at 12:24am - health - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was playing charades with my boyfriend and family. The answer was "Beckoning" so I acted it out with a "come here" gesture. He looked confused for a second, then blurted out "Fingering?" FML

#21378887
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27722) - you deserved it (3379)

On 03/21/2015 at 11:12am - misc - by ajodasdojsad (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, as I was closing up at my sandwich-making job when a huge bus full of basic, snobby, preppy cheerleaders came in. They literally "can't even" decide what they want. FML

Today, I had to take a dump at work. I walked into the bathroom and opened a stall, only to find what I can only describe as a fecal crime scene. It was like a turd had exploded mid-air. It was so vile, my anxiety kicked in and I broke down into a sobbing panic attack. FML

#21378385
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25097) - you deserved it (3080)

On 03/20/2015 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I was pulled over by a police officer because he thought I was skipping school. I'm 24 and we graduated high school together. FML

#21377506
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35129) - you deserved it (2466)

On 03/19/2015 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my maths class and I had to sit through a slideshow of photos of our teacher's cat. The cat's name is Mr Cat. FML

#21376941
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27298) - you deserved it (3466)

On 03/18/2015 at 5:44am - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, while working at McDonald's, a guy asked me to deep fry his salad. FML

#21376328
104 comments

Today, my mom and I made the bad decision to go hiking for some mother-daughter bonding even though we had little experience. My mother tumbled down a mountain named Tumbledown and I couldn't even enjoy the irony because I had to half carry her all the way back to the car. FML

#21375957
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26682) - you deserved it (3065)

On 03/16/2015 at 8:56pm - health - by manderpander21 - United States (New York)

Today, I've managed to go my whole nine-year teaching career without anyone vomiting in my classroom. That record was broken today when someone vomited four successive times in front of a class of 46 students. It was me. FML

#21373013
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30826) - you deserved it (2496)

On 03/12/2015 at 6:23am - work - by musicteacher - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after 4 years of nicely asking, I wrote an official memo to our logistics department, asking for new chairs for my subordinates. The logistics people came and concluded that there are more broken chairs than good ones, but suggested that perhaps we should all go on a diet. FML

#21372747
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25553) - you deserved it (2540)

On 03/11/2015 at 8:36pm - work - by Matei - Romania (Bucuresti)



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

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