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kimmi5

Offline (the 12/10/2014 at 3:45am) | Search for a member

kimmi5

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3127
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About kimmi5 : I enjoy FML and read fmls during my down time. I usually don't comment ever. I like to keep to myself mostly. If I look a little young, the picture is not of me but of my little sister. Thanks for taking the time to read about me.

kimmi5's page activity

Visits<b>greaterdane</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 9:07am<b>brndnmcmillan</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 9:55pm<b>olpally</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 2:19am<b>allstarrider</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 5:27pm<b>PleasantDino</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 7:11am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 1:10am<b>xdadev</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 12:18am<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 12:55pm<b>Sjus</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 2:13pm<b>DissyDemon</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 11:53pm<b>southernbelle_rn</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 10:33pm<b>fancypotato</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 1:26am<b>dmoran20</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 8:06pm<b>GhostDuck</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 6:32pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 12:24am<b>blueflygon</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 4:03am<b>Mike09220</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 8:45pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 10:22pm

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kimmi5's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss came around to my way of thinking. He called our customers a "bunch of assholes" and to kick them out if they gave me trouble. When a lady began yelling at me for "setting the damn prices too high" I told her to leave. My boss soon bitched me out for being unprofessional. FML

#20941693
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36724) - you deserved it (7014)

On 11/01/2013 at 6:47pm - work - by choke on a dick, sir (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, while working customer service, I instructed a customer to press the pound key on her cellphone. She hesitated a moment before asking, "Um, the pound key? You mean the hashtag, right?" FML

#20941322
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41926) - you deserved it (3890)

On 11/01/2013 at 12:49pm - work - by #isthisthepoundkey? - United States (Florida)

Today, an old man looked me dead in the eyes as he reached into my tip jar, grabbed the money, and then walked out of the store as if nothing ever happened. I was so shocked that I couldn't do anything to stop him. FML

#20941188
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37572) - you deserved it (9542)

On 11/01/2013 at 8:58am - money - by brokeasajoke - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I took my two and a half year-old son Trick or Treating for the first time in our new neighborhood. At the very first house, a girl told us we were too early and slammed the door in our face. My son cried. FML

Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML

#20941049
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86703) - you deserved it (6194)

On 11/01/2013 at 3:01am - intimacy - by PapaW - United States (Utah)

Today, while researching tea etiquette for Sunday's tea, I read, "to put milk in your tea before sugar is to cross the path of love, perhaps never to marry." I suddenly panicked that this very lack of knowledge is why I haven't met a man who wants to marry me, and that I never will. I'm only 23. FML

#20940705
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29001) - you deserved it (8487)

On 10/31/2013 at 9:11pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, some kid asked me if I was Mexican. After I explained to him that I was actually Venezuelan, he simply snorted and said, "That's the same f*cking thing. If you speak Spanish then you're Mexican." FML

#20939700
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46771) - you deserved it (5317)

On 10/30/2013 at 10:59pm - misc - by Rinelric1998 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me over Facebook. Unfortunately, she "accidentally" posted it on my wall instead of sending me a message, so the whole world could see it. My mom liked her post. FML

#20939479
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46887) - you deserved it (3517)

On 10/30/2013 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that, although I have the same job title and complete the same work as my male colleagues, I get paid 15% less, purely because I'm a girl. FML

#20939397
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53096) - you deserved it (7707)

On 10/30/2013 at 6:27pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, my boyfriend came onto me in a romantic gesture. We ended up having sex, forgetting that the window repair guy was supposed to come today and do some work on our third floor apartment windows. I still don't know how much he saw. FML

#20939175
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43056) - you deserved it (13374)

On 10/30/2013 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by English_Nut117 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a radio show asked the question, "Where does the dentist live in Finding Nemo?" I called in and got through. When he asked me the question, instead of the actual answer I quickly gave out my own address over live radio. FML

#20939023
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36618) - you deserved it (17415)

On 10/30/2013 at 11:58am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out my 13-year-old daughter thinks the showerhead got her pregnant. FML

Today, my girlfriend got a detention for public display of affection. We go to different schools. FML

#20937522
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54368) - you deserved it (4044)

On 10/29/2013 at 12:24am - love - by cmart_9 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to school without any makeup on. The guys who usually compliment me for being pretty are now calling me "The Greatest Illusion Ever". FML

#20936906
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44110) - you deserved it (19587)

On 10/28/2013 at 4:31pm - misc - by The greatest Illusion ever (woman) - United States

Today, a hornet thought it would be fun to fly into a candle that I had lit. As the hornet burned to death, it flung its charred body at my face, which is more painful than it sounds. FML

#20936891
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39622) - you deserved it (3096)

On 10/28/2013 at 4:18pm - misc - by Asshole hornet - United States (Massachusetts)



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