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kimeatszombies

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kimeatszombies

8Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 455
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About kimeatszombies : Vegetarian. Horror enthusiast. Skyrim addict. Professional cat petter.

kimeatszombies's page activity

Visits<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 9:47pm<b>nreed32</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 3:43pm<b>yaboi19</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 10:59am<b>0mysteriousman0</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 7:36am<b>eeemily2000</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 8:02pm<b>DolphinLaser23</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 2:32pm<b>xninix</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 12:08am<b>shksha22</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 11:35am<b>YuckyDuckyLucky</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 2:12pm<b>Seraphium</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 2:28am<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 1:47am<b>MetalxSoldier</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 6:03pm<b>5secondsofvvifi</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 9:57am<b>pred8885</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 4:26am<b>money2g</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 12:33am<b>K_kanaka</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 6:32pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 4:43pm<b>ironhead</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 4:29pm

Liked!<b>xninix</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 6:08am<b>boostedc</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 9:54am<b>robertd73</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 2:13pm<b>clairesucks</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 11:26am<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 5:33am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 2:31am<b>RA91</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 1:09am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 12:51pm

kimeatszombies's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of kimeatszombies's badges

kimeatszombies's favorite FMLs

Today, a guy attacked me and tried to steal my bag. I tried to defend myself by biting him as hard as I could. I then woke up to my husband screaming in pain. FML

#21360466
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31198) - you deserved it (3761)

On 02/21/2015 at 3:28pm - misc - by poncho55 (woman) -

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

Today, my classmate commented on how quiet I am. I responded with, "Well, nobody plots murder out loud," trying to be funny. My teacher tried to get me arrested. FML

#21318752
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35105) - you deserved it (6738)

On 12/16/2014 at 8:54pm - work - by justjoking - United States

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45910) - you deserved it (11859)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized my anger management has hit a new low when I screamed at a goose for being a goose. FML

#21309384
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27785) - you deserved it (7517)

On 12/01/2014 at 11:38am - misc - by WickedLittleDoll - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML

#21271608
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37217) - you deserved it (16418)

On 10/05/2014 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML

#21269654
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30197) - you deserved it (3834)

On 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm - kids - by mykodu - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43270) - you deserved it (8714)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while finally about to make love with my long term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML

#21249014
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47645) - you deserved it (5391)

On 08/31/2014 at 11:14am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML

Today, I put on some sexy lingerie, ready to have some fun with my husband. I found him in the living room, opening a bag of doritos in front of the TV. He saw me and understood. Then he looked back at the doritos, then back at me and said gravely, "No way, babe. No way." FML

#21190698
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51917) - you deserved it (6647)

On 06/27/2014 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML

#21154464
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48130) - you deserved it (5752)

On 05/28/2014 at 10:21am - love - by needanotherbed - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, I wanted to try seducing my boyfriend by having nothing but a t-shirt on for when he'd get back from work. He came home, saw me, apologized bashfully for failing to knock first, and went back outside. FML

#21097985
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43634) - you deserved it (6519)

On 03/27/2014 at 7:10pm - love - by oops (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on my sixth date with a guy I was beginning to really like. He asked if I'd mind if his friend Pete met up with us afterwards. I said sure. Turns out "Pete" is his penis. FML

Today, I had to bail my brother out of jail because he started a fight with a guy who didn't like owls. FML

#21082949
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43585) - you deserved it (4060)

On 03/10/2014 at 4:22am - misc - by are you kidding me? - United Kingdom (Ealing)



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