kimberly976

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kimberly976

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 466
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About kimberly976 : My name is Kimberly, I love cosmetology and fashion. I'm nice, fun and can get crazy at time. (:

Follow me!!
Twitter: @ShesAHmazing_
Instagram: @shesamazingg_
Kik: shesamazingg_

kimberly976's page activity

Visits<b>trex83</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 7:38am<b>Joel_Morris</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 9:22am<b>SadMansSandwich</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 8:21pm<b>WantsHazzasGravy</b> - the 05/28/2013 at 10:27pm<b>ydi_4_suking</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 11:08pm<b>djayy9011</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 1:57pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 4:43pm<b>waffule365</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 11:29am<b>iRucka</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 6:18pm<b>sweatypandalove</b> - the 04/30/2013 at 4:24pm<b>CholoChino</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 7:31pm<b>SalviBarbie</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 12:59pm<b>Notyours007</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 9:54pm<b>YNWA</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 4:04am<b>goodoldave</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 2:51am<b>capper44</b> - the 04/27/2013 at 3:48pm<b>homiwan</b> - the 04/27/2013 at 2:16pm<b>jay10137</b> - the 04/27/2013 at 2:07pm

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kimberly976's favorite FMLs

Today, I was getting into the mood with my boyfriend. Ten minutes into it, I told him to "teach me a lesson." His response: "I ain't no teacher." FML

by unforgettablee / 04/29/2013 at 3:08am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I summoned the courage to call my abusive mother-in-law about her non-payment of the money I stupidly lent her last year. She replied, "Why don't you go deepthroat a cactus, then we'll talk about it, cunt." and then hung up on me. FML

by a tad whipped / 04/28/2013 at 4:44pm / Australia / Money

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I woke up in the hospital. I had apparently overworked my heart so much that I fainted. What caused it? I was playing a racing game on my Wii and freaked out when I won first place. FML

by overexcited / 02/01/2010 at 7:40pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I heard the sound of footsteps in the basement. Thinking it was burglars I grabbed a baseball bat and hurried down the stairs. I then tripped on the stairs, fell down them and smacked my head on the bat. The sound of footsteps I heard? It was my cat playing in some cardboard boxes. FML

by dontbadouche / 02/01/2010 at 8:45am / Senegal / Animals

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking in my backyard. All I was wearing were my boxers and one sock. I staggered up to see my car halfway through my garage wall with a note saying "Sorry Dude". FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2009 at 1:11am / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation

Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

by awilson / 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cutting the grass when I saw a man staring at me from my neighbor's garage. This went on for 5 minutes until I finally yelled 'hello'. There was no response, and I was creeped out, so I called my neighbor. It was a life-sized Paul McCartney cutout. FML

by cachow / 09/06/2009 at 12:35am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was hit by a car. My sister ran to see if her phone I was carrying in my purse was okay. She screamed at me while I lay in the street because I was so dumb, and that I couldn't even watch for cars. Her screen was cracked. I had to call 911 for myself. FML

by hockey9797 / 07/15/2009 at 3:50pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2009 at 11:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML

by wtfdreams / 05/17/2009 at 8:33am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, it's my birthday. I have gotten three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office singing me a happy birthday. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2009 at 1:43pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend was in the shower, and I decided to go join him. I took all my clothes off and stepped into the bathroom. I slipped on some water, and ended up hitting my head on the toilet and passing out. When I came to, I saw my boyfriend's dad looking over me in his towel. Wrong person. FML

by showerstupid / 04/04/2009 at 4:04am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was trying to get drama students to attempt to make themselves cry. I was not having any luck, until suddenly a girl burst into tears, sobbing uncontrollably. I jumped up to applaud, saying what a wonderful thing it is to have such expressive kids. Turns out her grandma just died. FML

by dramateach11 / 04/02/2009 at 8:37pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous