About kilullu : Hi ya! I'm a fun, outgoing individual who enjoys the company of my beautiful, amazing friends. I'm also happy and fun!
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kilullu's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 04/26/2014 at 1:57am / Canada / Kids
Today, I was texting a girl I like, explaining how she looks like an attractive celebrity. She responded with a picture of a very unattractive lady and asked if she looked like that. I told her if she had been caught in a burning building, then yes, that would look like her. It was of her mom. FML
by spencerlong / 04/24/2014 at 11:02pm / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, after an entire year spent in physical therapy recovering from three knee surgeries, I finally returned to doing light agility exercises and running on a treadmill. When I told my therapist I had never been so happy and proud, he responded with, "This usually only takes 5 months, pussy." FML
by AnonymousAndSad / 04/24/2014 at 7:42pm / United States (Iowa) / Health
Today, I saw a cute guy and decided to say hi. As I started to think about things to talk about, one story in particular about a drummer who looked like Jesus stuck out in my mind. I was so nervous that instead of saying hi, I blurted out, "Some people look like Jesus!" and took off. FML
by wondercat40 / 04/24/2014 at 5:19pm / United States (Indiana) / Love
Today, my toddler found my daughter's recorder from 3rd grade and figured out how to play the highest pitch note. Of course, my daughter pulls out her trombone to have a jam session. And I'm out of ibuprofen. FML
by missmom83 / 04/24/2014 at 11:28am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids
by ewhy / 04/23/2014 at 2:37pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and he was moaning a lot. My ego was quickly crushed, though, when I found out they were moans of pain due to a foot cramp. We had to stop so I could rub his foot better. FML
by only my life / 04/22/2014 at 6:21pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy
Today, I used a facial mask for super sensitive skin, recommended by several friends with similar skin issues. Apparently, when the warning says, "May cause some slight redness for thirty minutes", it really means, "Your face will have hives and swell to twice its normal size for several hours." FML
by Tomatoe Face / 04/22/2014 at 1:31am / United States (Tennessee) / Health
Today, I joked to a client that every time I see his name, I start singing the song 'Dr Jones' by Aqua. He looked blankly at me, so I broke into song, 'Dr Jones, Dr Jones, calling Dr Jones... ' He still looked blankly, but now also utterly horrified, as were the rest of the waiting room. FML
by banana_tree / 04/21/2014 at 5:26pm / United Kingdom / Work
by sexual parrot / 04/21/2014 at 2:42pm / Intimacy
by Sue Ellen / 04/21/2014 at 11:43am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy
by BetterThanChocolate / 04/20/2014 at 7:24pm / United States (Maryland) / Animals
Today, I decided to be nice and pay a visit to my grandma. We ended up playing Scrabble. In between passing wind that smelled like rotting eggs, she kept playing the filthiest words she could, and yelled at me whenever I checked to see if they were in the Scrabble dictionary. FML
by Anonymous / 04/20/2014 at 5:38pm / Slovenia (Domzale Commune) / Miscellaneous
by Not-pregnant / 04/20/2014 at 1:21pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went hiking with my family. A local had told us about the trail, saying the two mile walk would lead us to a seventy-foot waterfall. After seven miles of trekking in the sweltering sun with no food, we finally found the waterfall. It was barely ten feet tall. FML
by why?? / 04/20/2014 at 12:52am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous