Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

kilullu

Offline (the 02/16/2014 at 3:27am) | Search for a member

kilullu

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1728
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About kilullu : Hi ya! I'm a fun, outgoing individual who enjoys the company of my beautiful, amazing friends. I'm also happy and fun!

kilullu's page activity

Visits<b>aspenmoon</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 2:27am<b>camogirl2249</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 1:52am<b>Smeedz</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 3:21pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 7:40am<b>xReDMemory</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 11:44am<b>LebanonBaby</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 10:17pm<b>MasterCheif456</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 1:15am<b>RicanDucky</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 3:16pm<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 6:50am<b>cat_marie</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 4:28am<b>ylime23456</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 11:08pm<b>mydadpulledout</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 11:21am<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 3:23am<b>dcisecurite</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 12:35am<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 12:49am<b>thatchick1405</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 2:04am<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 6:35pm<b>beatlesgirl2u2</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 3:48pm

Liked!<b>dcisecurite</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 6:36am

kilullu's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of kilullu's badges

kilullu's favorite FMLs

Today, a lady handed me a $10 tip on a $45 bill. I was happy with it, since it was more than 20%, until she came back in and said, "I'm sorry I gave you the wrong amount." I handed it back to her and then she gave me a dollar. FML

#21138539
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46916) - you deserved it (4461)

On 05/13/2014 at 9:58am - money - by monkey2069 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, in a waiting room, my 4-year-old daughter told me she saw two guys kissing. I quietly explained that some men like men, they're gay, and normal like everyone else. I was pleased with myself until the woman across from me scoffed and muttered, "Disgusting." FML

#21138395
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49311) - you deserved it (7545)

On 05/13/2014 at 1:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, the tornado sirens went off so my family went to the basement and turned on the TV to the local news. The station goes to their sky cam as a trampoline flies by. Quite the sight. When the storm passed, I looked outside to see our trampoline was gone. It was the one flying by on TV. FML

#21137290
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48513) - you deserved it (4420)

On 05/11/2014 at 11:29pm - misc - by Gone With the Wind - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I walked outside to see my boyfriend standing on my porch, looking confused. He explained to me that he had attached a prom proposal note to his pet rabbit, and let it inside my house to find me. We went looking for said rabbit, and found my dog halfway through eating it. FML

#21136990
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52636) - you deserved it (4913)

On 05/11/2014 at 6:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my best friend wanted to see what my new boyfriend looks like. By chance, he'd sent me a Snapchat a few minutes before, so I opened it to show her, only to see that it was a dick pic. FML

#21132642
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33579) - you deserved it (39482)

On 05/06/2014 at 7:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got a birthday package from my parents. It was all the stuff I'd forgotten there when visiting a month ago, along with some other things I'd left behind when I moved out. FML

#21130304
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36231) - you deserved it (5192)

On 05/04/2014 at 6:11am - misc - by chrono19 - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom discovered a new way to get over her breakup: yodelling. FML

#21129926
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39106) - you deserved it (3186)

On 05/03/2014 at 7:51pm - misc - by shylahrc - United States

Today, I once again had another guy's sweaty crotch pushed into my face. I still don't see why I enjoy wrestling. FML

Today, I was told that I'm very likely to win the "Most Likely to Exceed 5 Cats" yearbook award. My best friend said, "They wanted it to be 'Most Likely to Die Alone', but it was a bit harsh". Someone else added, "It's still pretty likely, though". FML

#21128889
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41081) - you deserved it (3993)

On 05/02/2014 at 3:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out the reason our toilet paper has been disappearing so fast recently isn't because my son is wanking like a gibbon as I first thought. He's just been using our shredder to make streamers out of the stuff, then hiding it all in a box in his closet. Fucking hell, son. FML

#21128713
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37154) - you deserved it (4091)

On 05/02/2014 at 10:04am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my wrists were hurting really bad while working the production line. I was told to let my supervisor know so he can help accommodate it. Both supervisors responded by ending my employment there to make sure I don't suffer long term damage. FML

Today, a drunken guest in the hotel I work at has barricaded himself in the employee restroom and refuses to come out, unless I "promise to love him forever." It's 4am and I'm the only one here. FML

Today, I had an ingrown toenail cut out, and the pain medication I received does not actually help with the pain. Instead, it makes me high, which results in me losing balance and slamming my injured toe into objects and then getting sick from that new pain. FML

#21128289
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42363) - you deserved it (4350)

On 05/01/2014 at 8:23pm - health - by pained (woman) - United States

Today, I didn't pay enough attention while sending a music file to be used in a powerful video my class-mates and I made about the Syrian civil war. Instead of a moving classical track, viewers were shown graphic scenes of devastation to the tune of Gangnam Style. FML

#21128082
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24114) - you deserved it (34935)

On 05/01/2014 at 4:10pm - work - by Mortifiedcharityworker (woman) - Austria

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML

#21127873
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49533) - you deserved it (4523)

On 05/01/2014 at 10:17am - animals - by Felicityfrank (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: