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killerxdeagles

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killerxdeagles
  • Town/Country : Lansing, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 6 November 1992 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 394
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About killerxdeagles : I'm a gamer on xbox live love to party and be outdoors. I also love to make guns. I want to be a cop

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killerxdeagles's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm too sunburned to masturbate. Now I have nothing to do. FML

#16432194
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17076) - you deserved it (48204)

On 05/31/2011 at 7:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I was hanging out with the guy I like. All of a sudden, he pulls out a small vial of his blood to give to me, proving his undying love. Curious, I asked where he had gotten the blood. His answer? A razor blade. In his nose. FML

#15479009
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25969) - you deserved it (4016)

On 03/25/2011 at 4:50am - misc - by radicaloser - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to get an ultrasound of my reproductive system done because I was having some abdominal pain. Everything was fine until the tech suddenly gasped and said, "Oh my God! You have two uteruses! Want me to print off a picture so you can show them off to your friends?" FML

#14898622
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26239) - you deserved it (2345)

On 02/08/2011 at 6:29pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I braved the winter weather conditions to get to a clinic for a prescription anti-diarrhea medication. When I arrived to find it closed, I turned around to walk to my car where I slipped on the ice. The impact made me simultaneously bruise my elbow and shit myself. FML

#14660867
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26834) - you deserved it (2730)

On 01/21/2011 at 10:13am - health - by chelseaface (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got a text just before class that my partner didn't finish their half of our 30 page research paper because "That class is stupid". FML

#14213516
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29142) - you deserved it (2788)

On 12/15/2010 at 3:11pm - work - by sam - United States

Today, I found out that while I see a therapist for my trust issues, my husband sleeps with our nanny. FML

#13885002
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32979) - you deserved it (2717)

On 11/18/2010 at 4:23am - intimacy - by nevergonnatrust -

Today, my house is suffering from an infestation of these tiny black beetles. After brushing my teeth tonight, I was rinsing out my toothbrush when I found that one of the beetles had curled up to die between the bristles. FML

#13883549
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26564) - you deserved it (3137)

On 11/18/2010 at 12:04am - health - by twice-a-day (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend and I were lying in her bed. We fooled around and were about to have sex as she suddenly began to cry without any reason. She cried for 30 minutes until I finally managed to calm her down. She said there was no reason for her crying. Then she fell asleep. FML

#13830899
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24999) - you deserved it (3425)

On 11/13/2010 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I was sitting at a traffic light when a cute girl appeared at the side of the road. I sat and watched her until she had crossed, when I realised that I had missed the light. A large queue of cars had built up behind me, yet none of them used their horn because I was driving my police car. FML

#13788956
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5547) - you deserved it (34600)

On 11/10/2010 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I found my son's iPod touch and was looking at a light-saber app. He walked into the living room to see me fighting the cat and making sound effects to myself. FML

#13760701
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4837) - you deserved it (19804)

On 11/08/2010 at 1:07am - animals - by yay! - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. Shes on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

#13661699
370 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53693) - you deserved it (7013)

On 10/31/2010 at 9:30am - intimacy - by Tai - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I decided to let in my new German Shepherd puppy inside to show the guest how adorable he is. In the middle of our conversation, he came running up to us with my vibrator in his mouth. FML

#13611565
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18417) - you deserved it (9366)

On 10/27/2010 at 3:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I found out that my 43 year old wife has been having a cyber relationship with a 14 year old kid on Halo. FML

#13589464
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33886) - you deserved it (3020)

On 10/25/2010 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I learned that making an illegal U-turn right after you see a cop doing one will not stop said cop from ticketing you. FML

Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

#13337964
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31412) - you deserved it (3043)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:32am - misc - by cantstoplaughing (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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