About killerxdeagles : I'm a gamer on xbox live love to party and be outdoors. I also love to make guns. I want to be a cop
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, I was at my boyfriend's grandmother's house meeting her for the first time. I excused myself to the restroom and as I walked out of the room I heard her say, "You could do a lot better. She's fat." Then I heard my boyfriend reply, "I know." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38773) - you deserved it (3646)
On 02/18/2013 at 2:09am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my leadership class was trying to decide who would run the kissing booth in our local carnival. Someone suggested me, to which the director replied, "We'd never make any profit with her." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26083) - you deserved it (2265)
On 02/17/2013 at 10:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, after being in the hospital for 2 weeks after emergency abdominal surgery, my girlfriend, who didn't even bother to ask how I was, made me hobble to her house just to dump me and send me straight back home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29183) - you deserved it (1604)
On 02/17/2013 at 8:28pm - love - by noname - United States (New York)
Today, my mom called me a "heartless bitch" for eating the last Hot Pocket. This is coming from a woman who, just last week, faked having cancer to get out of a speeding ticket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27651) - you deserved it (257)
On 02/17/2013 at 7:24pm - misc - by DontGetSlapped - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I shook her father's hand, he squeezed with an ungodly amount of force, leaned in with a smile, and murmured that my balls will be the next thing he'll crush if his daughter ever complains about me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27650) - you deserved it (3810)
On 02/17/2013 at 7:11pm - love - by daniel55 (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I found a cup full of urine in the bathtub. No one in my family knows where it came from. This is the second time it's happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23989) - you deserved it (1530)
On 02/08/2013 at 10:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML
I agree, your life sucks (44870) - you deserved it (6980)
On 02/08/2013 at 2:13am - intimacy - by mydadsgonnakillme (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I pointed out to my boyfriend how Valentine's day, my birthday, and our one-year anniversary were all coming up in the next few weeks. He then promptly broke up with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29377) - you deserved it (7542)
On 02/08/2013 at 1:24am - love - by katelynm - United States
Today, I had to have major oral surgery. Needless to say I am in need of some heavy pain medication. My pharmacist insists that my surgeon never called in my medicine, and my surgeon insists otherwise. This has been going back and forth for hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21661) - you deserved it (1104)
On 01/28/2013 at 4:18pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20670) - you deserved it (2238)
On 01/28/2013 at 3:14am - misc - by Creeped out (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, at my cousin's birthday party, my grandma took me to one side, slipped me a pad, and started ranting that tampons "steal your virginity" and that I should never use them. Well, okay then. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22213) - you deserved it (1723)
On 01/27/2013 at 2:08pm - misc - by dynah114 (woman) - Israel (HaMerkaz)
Today, I had to slowly explain to my son that an "analogy" is a literary device, not a genre of porn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20097) - you deserved it (1831)
On 01/27/2013 at 1:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, the rollercoaster I was on stuck upside down for a few minutes. I shat myself in terror. Then, gravity took effect. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33879) - you deserved it (6997)
On 01/27/2013 at 6:10am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I decided to change my hair color. After waiting in anticipation, I took a shower to rinse out the dye and reveal my new, blue hair. Rinsing revealed not only blue hair, but blue skin caused by the watered dye running over my body. I now look like a smurf, and it's not coming out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14602) - you deserved it (28869)
On 01/27/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
I agree, your life sucks (25951) - you deserved it (2361)
On 01/27/2013 at 12:57am - love - by pdub523 - United States (Texas)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
