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killabee

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killabee
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3253
  • Number of comments : 234
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About killabee : I am the hero this city needs, I am....The Coon.

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killabee's favorite FMLs

Today, I received an e-mail from the girls at work. It was an invite to lunch but it said, "Lunch today at Camber's, PLEASE don't tell Francoise, I don't think any of us can take any more of her!" I'm Francoise. FML

#436130
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76405) - you deserved it (16997)

On 03/18/2009 at 9:02am - work - by Francoise3 (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, after work I went to the parking lot to my car to go home. I found my car doors heavily scratched and all my tires cut, with a note on my windshield. The note read, "F*** you, Jackson." I'm Tyler. Jackson is my co-worker. FML

#402387
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (170134) - you deserved it (8209)

On 03/16/2009 at 11:17pm - work - by Dansonn (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was filling out paperwork with my new doctor. During the questionnaire, she asked if I was sexually active. I said yes. She then asked, "What do you do?" I told her I normally did vaginal, but sometimes anal. She blushed and started to laugh. She was asking where I worked. FML

Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my penis over my jeans and said "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML

#364382
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (167948) - you deserved it (25761)

On 03/15/2009 at 11:20pm - intimacy - by illequipt - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very christian family I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" and walked out of the room. FML

#283028
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (240685) - you deserved it (36566)

On 03/12/2009 at 1:53pm - intimacy - by sucks - United States

Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she asked me, "Does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked, "Does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML

#209116
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (218698) - you deserved it (28164)

On 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Girl123999 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1095634) - you deserved it (108831)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I emailed my boyfriend from work. Out of habit, I absent-mindedly entered my department into the "From" field. My boyfriend didn't notice when he replied. Now my entire department knows I want to "drop to my knees and suck him when I get home." And he plans to "finish on my face." FML

#133145
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12277) - you deserved it (61588)

On 02/25/2009 at 1:41pm - work - by foolishgirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to Macy's to go shopping, I was wearing a shirt and tie and dressed nicely. Customers came up to me with questions, but I just ignored them. Minutes later, thinking I was an employee, the manager came and yelled at me, and threatened to fire me. FML

#85022
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37939) - you deserved it (10174)

On 02/20/2009 at 12:27am - work - by muffinmen1022 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I need to go to the toilet. Thinking that everyone has left work, I decide that, since I AM a jedi, my penis ought to be my Light saber. All of a sudden I hear a familiar voice: “At least someone is having fun!” It was my boss. FML

#523
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5835) - you deserved it (20274)

On 12/15/2008 at 10:58pm - work - by lopez - Sent from mobile version

Today, thinking that I’m alone at work, I start rummaging through my nose trying to find something interesting. It’s only after about a minute that I notice that my boss is looking straight at me. FML

#242
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6814) - you deserved it (39461)

On 11/07/2008 at 5:10am - work - by JoLaFritte - Sent from mobile version



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