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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4198
  • Number of comments : 234
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About killabee : I am the hero this city needs, I am....The Coon.

killabee's page activity

Visits<b>ShroudedKnife</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 12:57am<b>smallandroid</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 12:12am<b>laurenada</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 4:13pm<b>hunter1019</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 8:10pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 04/02/2016 at 11:47pm<b>skyironsword</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 8:03am<b>Supaviper</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 11:20am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 11:54pm<b>fangirlofthings</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 3:35pm<b>balboa_2</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 8:44am<b>amburrjade</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 1:11pm<b>Dalboz</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 12:02am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 10:30am<b>duduv2</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 12:23am<b>ladyofdeath13</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 12:58am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 6:07pm<b>thatguynamedsky</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 10:39am<b>Saso</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 9:59pm

Fucked!<b>ladyofdeath13</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 6:58am

killabee's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

killabee's favorite FMLs

Today, I sent everyone a text on my phone book saying, "Happy Star Wars Day!!! May the Fourth be with you!!" I forgot to uncheck my ex-girlfriend's number. She texted back, "One of the many reasons I broke up with you." FML

by 1suckatL1fe / 05/04/2009 at 3:04pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I went into work to set up a new store. There was a lot of lifting so I dressed casual. This happened to be the day the owner brought in his conservative family to check out the store. I was wearing a shirt that says "everyone poops" and has a donkey and elephant pooping. FML

by anonymous / 05/04/2009 at 1:40am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I got a cross-country job promotion. I decided to plan my Going-Away-Forever party, and bought a pack of 100 invitations. After mailing them out to all my friends, I have 92 left. FML

by caphis / 05/03/2009 at 2:17am / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, I went to the doctor for a checkup. The doctor went through the normal questions, then paused for a moment and jotted something down. Later when I got back my report from the checkup, I noticed that the doctor had checked the "no" box by "sexually active." She didn't even ask me that. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2009 at 8:05pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I opened my email expecting to see messages from my friends and family wishing me a happy birthday, but there were none. There were Happy Birthday messages from Pizza Hut and Victoria's Secret, however. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2009 at 2:36pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went up to a secluded mountain my boyfriend took me to for our first date. As I saw another couple hooking up in the bushes, I phoned my boyfriend to tell him someone found our secret spot. His Bob Marley ringtone started playing from the bush. FML

by liveforpeace_ / 04/28/2009 at 2:27am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I was in a tour group going through a cave and our guide stopped, turned off the lights, and told us to be quiet so we could feel absolute silence. I farted. FML

by fartmaster / 04/22/2009 at 3:10pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, half asleep, I dropped my pill before I could take it. I quickly picked it up and washed it down. Five hours later, I just found my pill on the ground. What did I swallow? FML

by anonymiss / 04/13/2009 at 12:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, for the first time ever, a woman saw my penis. I am 30 years old. The woman was my doctor. She snorted to cover a laugh and apologized. FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2009 at 5:40pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I went to the doctor because my arm hurt. When he told me I had tennis elbow I said "that's funny I don't play tennis". Then he asked me if I had a girlfriend. When I said no he said "Well I guess we solved this one." FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2009 at 12:34am / United States (Georgia) / Health

Today, I was in an audition for a production at this theater in town. The directors at the table loved my audition. One of them said "I'd love to talk to you about coming to TCU." I said "Oh, yeah! I know Harry Parker at TCU who runs the theater department." I said this to Harry Parker. FML

by Zak / 04/02/2009 at 10:12pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 4:18pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was mowing the lawn of my brand new house, located in a very nice neighborhood (I am a hispanic male), and a lady in her nice white cadillac drove up and asked me, in extremely broken spanish, if I could mow her lawn too. FML

by Michaelichael / 03/28/2009 at 4:17pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I repaired a boiler for a wealthy guy in a big house. While there, I fixed a leaking tap for free. When I went to go, the man slipped something into my shirt pocket and said "have a drink on me." When I got to my truck, I discovered that he'd given me a tea bag. FML

by toast / 03/25/2009 at 12:33pm / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Work