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killabee

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killabee
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3251
  • Number of comments : 234
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About killabee : I am the hero this city needs, I am....The Coon.

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killabee's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend fed me chocolate chip cookies with laxatives in them because he was concerned I did not poop enough. FML

#15012596
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32696) - you deserved it (3642)

On 02/17/2011 at 3:08am - health - by clashgurl8449 -

Today, I printed out a picture of the popular girl in school as a sort of 'model' for how I wanted my hair cut. The hairdresser taped the picture to the mirror so he could see. Halfway through, my 'model' came in for an appointment. FML

#14993879
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23177) - you deserved it (15428)

On 02/15/2011 at 8:34pm - misc - by nerdychick (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I watched my grandfather try and park his car inside the storage area for shopping carts, thinking it was a parking space. FML

#14934394
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20335) - you deserved it (2748)

On 02/11/2011 at 10:46am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s teacher asking me to come pick her up. My daughter wouldn’t tell her what was wrong. I left an important work meeting. When I got there she stated her boyfriend broke up with her and she couldn't emotionally make it through the rest of the day. She's 5. FML

Today, after a huge heartbreak and a night of crying, I wake up to an empty house. I go in the kitchen to make breakfast and see a note on the counter saying "We heard you crying last night and didn't want to hear you complaining this morning, so we went to the mall. -Mom" FML

#14895293
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35339) - you deserved it (7449)

On 02/08/2011 at 12:21pm - love - by heartbroken - United States

Today, my girlfriend sent me a naked picture of herself and I wish she hadn't. FML

#2955411
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26457) - you deserved it (68140)

On 06/16/2009 at 9:44pm - intimacy - by MisterSeth (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML

#2812014
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90630) - you deserved it (19049)

On 06/11/2009 at 8:23pm - misc - by NoBalls (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I had to play the role of superman in a production on stage. They had to stuff my underwear because my 'thing' wasn't big enough. FML

#2769644
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65010) - you deserved it (5035)

On 06/10/2009 at 11:46am - misc - by superman_not (man) - United Kingdom (Perth and Kinross)

Today, I finally confessed to the guy I've liked for 2 years. I told him that I've really liked him for a long time and that I knew he had a girlfriend and I didn't expect anything from him, I just wanted him to know. His response: "Are you done? 'Cause I need to go to the bathroom." FML

#2749071
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45980) - you deserved it (13619)

On 06/09/2009 at 5:40pm - love - by ohwell (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710
1157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69232) - you deserved it (179574)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML

#2244608
452 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34477) - you deserved it (113951)

On 05/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by helloitsbrian6969 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, was my wedding night. We had decided to wait until marriage to have sex. When I undressed and smiled at my new wife, she burst into tears and cried, "please don't make me do this." FML

#2200863
532 comments

I agree, your life sucks (197003) - you deserved it (20883)

On 05/23/2009 at 12:44am - intimacy - by honeymoondisaster (woman) - United States (California)



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