About kickazz16 : I like cookies, sleep, chicken nuggets, and snuggies.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I asked my boyfriend to try and man up and act a bit tougher. He started crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27263) - you deserved it (12945)
On 11/17/2010 at 9:32pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I tried to demonstrate to my friend how laughably dull our kitchen knives are by swiping one across my palm. Turns out Dad noticed the problem yesterday and sharpened them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6759) - you deserved it (34385)
On 03/11/2010 at 3:13am - misc - by ShowOff (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)
Today, I was developing film at walmart. It started to get a little warm, so I began taking off my sweatshirt. This creepy old man approaches me, saying "You know, usually girls like you are paid to take their clothes off." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23510) - you deserved it (3405)
On 02/03/2010 at 1:24am - misc - by hotandbothered (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and after 10 seconds he gave up and said "This is more tiring than I expected". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16269) - you deserved it (2390)
On 01/23/2010 at 11:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was on a stationary bike at the gym. I got into a conversation with a very attractive female gym-friend. I felt something cool "down below". I looked down and saw one of my testicles had sneaked out of a hole in my shorts, I quickly looked up only to see her staring at the same thing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13839) - you deserved it (3125)
On 12/08/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by fatguyinalittlecoat (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I drove 600 miles to be with my boyfriend of two years for his uncle's funeral. He didn't want me to come because I am seven months pregnant and flying is dangerous in the third trimester. When I got there I don't know who was more suprised to see me: him, his wife, or their kids. FML
I agree, your life sucks (63000) - you deserved it (4396)
On 11/08/2009 at 10:39am - love - by homewrecker - United States
Today, I woke up to my 8 month old son happy as can be. I could hear him laughing over the monitor. When I walked into the room, he had somehow got his diaper off and was holding onto his new found penis. He thought it was hysterical when it went off and shot urine everywhere. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32580) - you deserved it (3464)
On 09/09/2009 at 3:33pm - kids - by WOCOACH (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was sprinting to the bus stop trying to beat the bus. It pulled next to me and honked, startling me off the edge of the road. My foot slipped, I went tumbling, roadrashing my leg. The bus driver stopped, opened the door, and yelled "I was just letting you know this is a training bus." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27817) - you deserved it (2844)
On 08/04/2009 at 5:09pm - misc - by duzitickle (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I got a call from my boyfriend. He was at the police station for breaking into a model home to hook up with the girl he's been cheating on me with for the past 4 months. I was his one phone call. He was expecting me to bail him out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47460) - you deserved it (2359)
On 07/23/2009 at 7:25pm - love - by Inga44 (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, my husband of one week lost his wedding ring while we were preparing for a dinner party. After a thorough search and no luck, I started to cry. He told me to quit being a drama queen because we had guests. He then got drunk with his friends, puked on the patio, and called me a bitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58482) - you deserved it (7988)
On 06/28/2009 at 12:05pm - love - by honeymoonisover (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, we were having a school prize giving. I heard my name called and I walked up to the stage waving and smiling, feeling rather proud of myself. I stood by the microphone and started my acceptance speech, only to be tapped on the shoulder by the girl they actually called up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16773) - you deserved it (31706)
On 06/18/2009 at 9:05am - misc - by Jessey (woman) - United Kingdom (Swindon)
Today, I decided to finaly use the gym membership I got a few weeks ago. After I returned to the locker room, the locker I used was opened with all my stuff, including my iTouch, cell phone, and my wallet with cash stolen. It turns out I left the sticker that tells you your combo on my new lock. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12445) - you deserved it (53884)
On 05/20/2009 at 1:54pm - misc - by Sweeney (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (139485) - you deserved it (32530)
On 05/17/2009 at 8:33am - intimacy - by wtfdreams (man) - United States (California)
Today, it was my first day working at a milking parlor. As I crouched behind a cow to put on an udder cluster, I looked up and gasped just in time for the cow to crap on my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34610) - you deserved it (4897)
On 02/13/2009 at 7:42am - animals - by abi_vet_student (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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