About kewlkate : :)
kewlkate's FML badges
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
50 quality responses
Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
kewlkate's favorite FMLs
Today, while I was sleeping, my girlfriend took my phone and set the ringtone to a bloodcurdling scream. I found this out when I received a call while driving to work and, thinking someone was being murdered in my backseat, I panicked and swerved into a parked car. FML
by iscreamforicecream / 06/01/2011 at 7:53am / United States (Arizona) / Transportation
Today, I met my boyfriend's extended family. His grandpa was apparently senile, as he kept calling me "Tilly" and asking me to dance. His relatives thought this hilarious and busted out the video camera. Later, I learned his grandpa is not senile at all - the family was playing a joke on me. FML
by NotTilly / 03/10/2010 at 9:54am / United States (Texas) / Love
by poppet2010 / 01/17/2010 at 10:58am / Miscellaneous
Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently copied my key before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering: “He looks like Jesus.” FML
by Anonymous / 12/20/2009 at 3:47am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, campus security called to inform me that my car had been in an accident. I rushed down to the security office to find most of the officers laughing. A portable john blew over on to my car and smashed my rear window. Now, security calls me "Port-A-Potty Guy," and my car smells like shit. FML
by Johnny on the Spot / 02/12/2009 at 12:19pm / United States (Missouri) / Transportation
Today, my 63-year-old neighbor jumped out of his window. I was the first to find him, alive, naked and stuck in a bush. I guess I shouldn't have laughed at him while waiting for the ambulance, because he was my landlord. FML
- Today, my boyfriend and I were on the phone. He started talking dirty, and saying how horny he was,… Today, I got food poisoning and have had the worst diarrhea ever. I laid down in bed, hoping to get… Today, I realized that my husband and I are at that point in our marriage where "sleeping together"…