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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 24 July 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1622
  • Number of comments : 97
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About kewlkate : :)

kewlkate's page activity

Visits<b>zipJohn</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 12:42am<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 10:32pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 10:27pm<b>ExtremeEncounter</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 9:36pm<b>adamant84</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 2:07am<b>Lanker</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 5:38pm<b>buckydargon</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 1:08pm<b>maryiah</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 12:21am<b>thekingpit</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 8:39am<b>mangoboy1</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 8:54pm<b>XxQueenofPuppets</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 8:26am<b>footcheezeez</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 1:24am<b>RevengeIsSweet</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 3:31pm<b>mb2_native</b> - the 12/29/2012 at 6:57pm<b>KiwiExchange</b> - the 12/29/2012 at 5:30pm<b>flyersfan95</b> - the 12/29/2012 at 9:57am<b>abbeyXD</b> - the 12/22/2012 at 10:32am<b>FYLDeep</b> - the 12/18/2012 at 5:37am

kewlkate's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of kewlkate's badges

kewlkate's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, while at my cosmetics job, an elderly lady came up to me asking for a product. I told her we had a smaller size and a larger size for a better deal. She told me she wanted the smaller size because she'd "probably be dead" before she finished that one. I laughed. She was serious. FML

by Anonymous / 06/10/2012 at 4:47am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML

by ugh / 06/08/2012 at 12:35am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, during the early hours, I got hungry and went to grab something to eat. I entered the kitchen, only to see my stark-naked dad sitting at the table, eating cereal and reading the paper. He just nodded at me and said, "Son." I think I need a new pair of eyes. FML

by Rohirus / 06/07/2012 at 7:09pm / Sweden / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

by Scared / 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, if you live in California, you might have seen a crazy drunk guy naked in front of a McDonald's, waving at everyone. Yeah, that was probably me. FML

by smh / 05/13/2012 at 6:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally kicked a can and it hit a man's shoe. He tried to kick it at me but his foot somehow failed to connect with the can. I could hear it rattling behind me as he failed again and again. So he decided to run up behind me and throw it at my head. FML

by thepigeonsfriend / 05/07/2012 at 10:08am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML

by Anonymous / 04/22/2012 at 1:12pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

by Hakimstah / 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm / Lebanon / Intimacy

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

by SeeingLlamas / 04/17/2012 at 5:38am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to pull some weeds in my backyard. Everything was going great until I got a concussion. My dog thought that it would be fun to headbutt me from a running start. Twice. FML

by Lee / 04/09/2012 at 11:50pm / United States / Animals

Today, I noticed a strange lady following me around in the mall. After a while I began to get creeped out, so I confronted her. Apparently she has to make sure everything she buys is better than what I buy. After a long silence she said, "What? You never noticed me before?" FML

by Eliza / 04/03/2012 at 11:40pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I started my research project on horror stories and people's fascination with them. I did some research and wound up reading H.P. Lovecraft. On the upside, I can now pee more easily. On the downside, it's likely to be in my pants. FML

by Anonymous / 03/24/2012 at 6:05pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML

by vanorav / 03/17/2012 at 10:41pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous