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kewlkate

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kewlkate
  • Town/Country : Land of Ooh, Candy Kingdom
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 24 July 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 808
  • Number of comments : 97
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About kewlkate : :)

kewlkate's last visitors

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

50 quality responses

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kewlkate's favorite FMLs

Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML

#20563680
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61620) - you deserved it (15550)

On 03/28/2013 at 11:11am - intimacy - by everyoneheard (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

#20562846
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70695) - you deserved it (6035)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I started at my new job. The woman who I'll be working right next to 40 hours a week introduced herself with, "I know what your name is. I know what you're planning, and I've been sent to destroy you." FML

#20512419
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29219) - you deserved it (3232)

On 02/18/2013 at 5:15pm - work - by ari (woman) - United States

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML

#20462136
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31835) - you deserved it (3396)

On 01/16/2013 at 2:52am - misc - by WTF (man) -

Today, my hamster died. It climbed out of its cage and jumped off my dresser. Looking for condolences, I told my mom who replied, "If I lived in your room, I would have done it earlier." FML

#20453156
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22763) - you deserved it (5763)

On 01/11/2013 at 2:09am - animals - by deadhammy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I told my girlfriend that my identical twin and I are not in fact related, that he's adopted, and that the only reason we look exactly the same is because we eat and drink the same things. She actually believed it. FML

#20453003
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29301) - you deserved it (8290)

On 01/11/2013 at 12:20am - misc - by datingablonde - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I paused the movie my girlfriend and I were watching and told her, for the first time, that I loved her. Her response was to stare at me silently for a few seconds before unpausing the film. FML

#20440422
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29924) - you deserved it (4809)

On 01/03/2013 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I felt down, so I laid in bed and told my parents I needed some alone time. A couple of minutes later, one of them started blasting "All by Myself" so loud that I felt the floorboards vibrate. FML

#20420113
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29415) - you deserved it (3249)

On 12/25/2012 at 12:00am - love - by all by myself - United States (Alaska)

Today, I was hit in the head by a golf ball. I wasn't near a golf course, and nobody was anywhere in sight. I'm still trying to figure out what happened. FML

#20403784
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34949) - you deserved it (3380)

On 12/17/2012 at 2:38pm - health - by wtf - United States

Today, I spent nearly half an hour trying to dispel my sister's belief that men have to strap down their penises before going jogging. FML

#20402473
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25863) - you deserved it (3280)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Waterford)

Today, while my mother was driving me to school, her coffee started to spill. So like a normal parent, she held it over my lap. FML

#20397679
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20854) - you deserved it (1581)

On 12/13/2012 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my daughter wore my favorite Christmas sweater to an ugly sweater party. FML

#20201801
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18726) - you deserved it (8395)

On 12/12/2012 at 11:05am - kids - by Saduglydad - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a presentation in French class. I was so nervous, the first thing I said when I got up there was, "Hola." FML

#20193303
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18028) - you deserved it (3221)

On 12/06/2012 at 12:35am - work - by SpanishInFrenchClass (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter had a meltdown when I told her I donated some of her old toys to Goodwill. It turns out Toy Story has taught her that toys have feelings and that she has a meaningful relationship with them. She's in her teens. FML

#20167023
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13154) - you deserved it (21407)

On 11/17/2012 at 5:31pm - kids - by susan (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at the library using a computer to order a package. A man sat down next to me mumbling to himself while staring at me. As I got up to go to the printer, he pointed at me and screamed, "I will burn you alive and enjoy it!" All of my info including my address was still on the computer screen. FML

#20161493
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20534) - you deserved it (4399)

On 11/13/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by sarahcurtis213 - United States



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