kewlkali

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kewlkali

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1796
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 43 posted

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kewlkali's page activity

Visits<b>redstone7693</b> - the 03/25/2016 at 12:04pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 9:41am

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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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kewlkali's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter asked why there was an X marked on a telephone pole. I told her they were going to remove it. She started crying and saying, "They can't kill the tree!" She is 16. FML

by anon / 07/09/2011 at 12:48am / Australia (Victoria) / Kids

Today, I had to go to a birthday party for 10 year old triplets. They've all been dead for more than 9 years. FML

by Anonymous / 06/20/2011 at 12:03am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that as a supervisor, if you reprimand a female worker and end the conversation with "Now get back to making sandwiches." your boss will consider it sexism and suspend you. I work at Subway. FML

by MakeMeASandwich / 06/10/2011 at 1:01am / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, my only motivation to get out of bed was cupcakes in the refrigerator. FML

by skigal24 / 05/30/2011 at 10:59am / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I was told that I am an incredibly boring person and that it's no wonder I have no friends. I think they're right; last night I dreamt about a nail file. FML

by goinginsane / 05/06/2011 at 3:25am / Miscellaneous

Today, I found myself crying for an hour when my recreated crush on The Sims 3 game rejected my character and ran off with someone else. FML

by Nxydolli / 04/29/2011 at 3:34pm / United Kingdom (Durham) / Geek

Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself "I wish I had a boyfriend like that". I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2011 at 11:15am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to take our first shower together. When he came into the room, he had swimming trunks on. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2010 at 1:21am / Intimacy

Today, after buying some groceries, I walked back to my car. After trying several times to get in the door, I finally look up and see a terrified little boy holding onto his teacup poodle for dear life, frantically waving me away. My car was two spots over. FML

by me / 12/18/2010 at 10:20pm / United States / Transportation

Today, whilst driving to the store, an idiot driver found it to be okay to drive ridiculously fast in below freezing temperatures on the ice and snow. As he passed my car, I angrily gave him the finger. And then I realized I was wearing mittens. FML

by Anonymous / 11/25/2010 at 12:24am / United States (Washington) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my teacher turned around from the blackboard and screamed, "Stop chewing your gum like a cow!" That wasn't so bad.--The bad part was when she realized it was me, she apologized saying, " I am sorry. You are not really a cow. I don't want to traumatize you; you're just overweight." FML

by teach / 11/14/2010 at 2:31am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was following a makeup tutorial on YouTube. The girl said to apply concealer to any "problem areas" on my face. When I was done, 90% of my face was covered in concealer. FML

by demaris / 10/30/2010 at 7:46pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making out with my new boyfriend when he pulled away and looked me deeply in the eyes, he smiled and said, "I don't care what anyone else says, I think you're beautiful." FML

by JH / 06/30/2010 at 9:43pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, was the third day of my camping trip with my "friends". I woke up in my boxers with my hand glued to my forehead. FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2010 at 5:36am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my very handsome, fit, Russian boyfriend tried to make me feel better about being a little overweight by telling me, "It's okay, you're American, everyone expects you to be fat." FML

by ChubbyAmerican / 05/22/2010 at 7:24pm / United States (New Mexico) / Love