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kewlkali

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kewlkali

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1224
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 39 posted

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You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

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kewlkali's favorite FMLs

Today, I was told that I am an incredibly boring person and that it's no wonder I have no friends. I think they're right; last night I dreamt about a nail file. FML

#16064729
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31348) - you deserved it (6861)

On 05/06/2011 at 3:25am - misc - by goinginsane -

Today, I found myself crying for an hour when my recreated crush on The Sims 3 game rejected my character and ran off with someone else. FML

#15978808
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18727) - you deserved it (54036)

On 04/29/2011 at 3:34pm - love - by Nxydolli (man) - United Kingdom (Durham)

Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself "I wish I had a boyfriend like that". I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML

#15678976
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36756) - you deserved it (13739)

On 04/07/2011 at 11:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to take our first shower together. When he came into the room, he had swimming trunks on. FML

#14404021
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37564) - you deserved it (5347)

On 12/31/2010 at 1:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, after buying some groceries, I walked back to my car. After trying several times to get in the door, I finally look up and see a terrified little boy holding onto his teacup poodle for dear life, frantically waving me away. My car was two spots over. FML

#14253305
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10530) - you deserved it (26466)

On 12/18/2010 at 10:20pm - misc - by me - United States

Today, whilst driving to the store, an idiot driver found it to be okay to drive ridiculously fast in below freezing temperatures on the ice and snow. As he passed my car, I angrily gave him the finger. And then I realized I was wearing mittens. FML

Today, my teacher turned around from the blackboard and screamed, "Stop chewing your gum like a cow!" That wasn't so bad.--The bad part was when she realized it was me, she apologized saying, " I am sorry. You are not really a cow. I don't want to traumatize you; you're just overweight." FML

#13836684
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36460) - you deserved it (7946)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:31am - misc - by teach (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was following a makeup tutorial on YouTube. The girl said to apply concealer to any "problem areas" on my face. When I was done, 90% of my face was covered in concealer. FML

#13653489
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24353) - you deserved it (5412)

On 10/30/2010 at 7:46pm - misc - by demaris (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my very handsome, fit, Russian boyfriend tried to make me feel better about being a little overweight by telling me, "It's okay, you're American, everyone expects you to be fat." FML

#10696817
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36056) - you deserved it (15203)

On 05/22/2010 at 7:24pm - love - by ChubbyAmerican (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I had my cigs tucked into my waistband because my shorts didn't have pockets. A friend walks up and asks for a smoke. I say "I've got something you can smoke right here", tugging at my shorts. The "friend" then kicks me in the nuts for being a douche. FML

#7637016
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8497) - you deserved it (38504)

On 01/28/2010 at 5:24am - misc - by wishihadpockets (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, as I walked into my class, someone shouted at me, "Wild Snorlax Appeared! Use Your Ultra Balls!", since I am overweight and everyone in class laughed at me. I got made fun of by Pokémon nerds. FML

#7442333
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37112) - you deserved it (7769)

On 01/19/2010 at 7:03pm - misc - by snorlax (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was told by 'Seventeen' to add liquid highlighter to my foundation for an all-over glow. Little did I know that liquid highlighter is an actual makeup product. I now have an awful rash due to applying the ink from a highlighter pen. FML

#6955134
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8800) - you deserved it (88845)

On 12/26/2009 at 11:18am - health - by rtrim29 (woman) - United States (Florida)



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