kevint9911

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Offline (the 09/24/2014 at 5:19pm)

kevint9911

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 30 March 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5687
  • Number of comments : 75
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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kevint9911's page activity

Visits<b>Flamecube</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 2:07am<b>Zach_attack_</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 8:35pm<b>LivClaire96</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 10:56am<b>SiRiSpartan</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 11:45pm<b>nathancarter</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 12:22am<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 12:13pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 12:00pm<b>getrekt</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 8:19am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 5:44pm<b>RedTailBoa</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 4:06pm<b>intheheart</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 1:48pm<b>sydneytaylor2516</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 1:47pm<b>ladyleo88</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 12:48pm<b>PlasticSand</b> - the 02/08/2012 at 10:38pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 1:51am

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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kevint9911's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my mom about an article I'd seen that said people tend to make the most mistakes at 2 to 3 in the morning. Without a trace of humor in her voice, she said, "Tell me about it. You were conceived round about then." FML

by fmlsomuch / 02/25/2012 at 3:51pm / Japan / Miscellaneous

Today, I was feeling frisky for the first time in months, so I started feeling up my husband. He kept insisting he had a headache and that he wasn't feeling it tonight. When I noticed his sarcasm, he said "Yeah, doesn't feel so great, does it?" and turned the TV volume up. FML

by Anonymous / 02/24/2012 at 10:07pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was texting the guy I like. He's really smart, funny, athletic, and cute. This all changed when he told me he was jacking off. FML

by idrathernotgiveoutmyname / 01/30/2012 at 9:50pm / Canada / Intimacy

Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm / United States (Arizona) / Health

Today, I found out my girlfriend starts fights with me over text because apparently, when I'm arguing with someone, I stop speaking in "annoying shorthand" and am grammatically correct. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2011 at 5:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, despite being 21 years old and living in my own place, my mom still managed to walk in on me whacking off. FML

by ikungfuyou / 12/27/2011 at 2:11am / United States / Intimacy

Today, is Christmas day. Normally, I'd spend it with family. However, my boss decided everyone has to work today, despite the fact that there's enough people who want to work to run the place. Apparently it's "fairer" if we all have to do it - except him. FML

by Anonymous / 12/25/2011 at 1:25am / United Kingdom (Cornwall) / Work

Today, a student came in late to class, and there were only a couple of seats available. I waved her over offering her the seat beside me with the quip, "It's OK, you can sit by me. I don't smell or anything." I realized after she sat down that she actually did. FML

by Derpina / 12/21/2011 at 10:33am / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found that when a hot girl asks you whether you have a girlfriend, saying, "I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one" is not the best way to proceed. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2011 at 1:45am / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, while I was watching TV, my boyfriend took my unicorn pillow pet and made it hump my arm. I told him to stop acting like a child. He replied, "Children don't have sex like this," and started making sex noises while making the pillow pet hump my arm faster and harder. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2011 at 8:01am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML

by jessi / 12/02/2011 at 8:22am / United States / Kids

Today, I sat on Santa's lap. He got an erection. FML

by pops up / 12/01/2011 at 5:25pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I was woken up at 6am to the sound of my mother on the back deck of the house hooting like an owl. FML

by tireedddddd / 11/25/2011 at 11:24am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to the smell of bacon. It smelled so good, and made me very hungry. Then I realized it was my neighbor cooking. I have no money or bacon. FML

by Username / 11/25/2011 at 11:15am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my wife has been bribing my daughter to keep quiet about her affair with my boss. That would explain the iPhone 4S, the $500 shoes, the $200 purse, and the professional $300 haircut. They told me it was because she had straight A's. FML

by brokeandalone / 11/20/2011 at 9:05pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids