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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11142) - you deserved it (19309)
On 09/24/2012 at 9:51pm - kids - by Fingkids - United States
Today, I asked my college chemistry teacher for some much-needed help. Instead of explaining anything to me, she scoffed that if I don't understand something, I should "just Google it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14108) - you deserved it (1124)
On 09/21/2012 at 12:22pm - misc - by hopelesscollegestudent - Canada
Today, I found the perfect opportunity to throw my husband a surprise party since he thought I was away on a business trip. He came home with a hooker. Surprise! FML
I agree, your life sucks (36063) - you deserved it (1980)
On 08/12/2012 at 1:49am - intimacy - by happybirthday - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10481) - you deserved it (25092)
On 04/11/2012 at 12:25pm - misc - by erockinthesuburb (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I woke up after a long night of partying. When I went to wash off my face, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. My missing tooth was almost enough to make me overlook my black eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8701) - you deserved it (24185)
On 01/01/2012 at 12:19pm - misc - by msnewyearseve - United States (New York)
Today, I found out that my neighbors took it upon themselves to knock down the fence we shared, and putting up a new one. Thus fencing my pool into their yard. When I asked them why, he replied, "We thought you weren't coming back." I was gone for 4 months tending to my sister with breast cancer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32898) - you deserved it (1387)
On 09/04/2011 at 2:09am - misc - by Pool-less - United States (Missouri)
Today, at work, I was walking to the back office, and I didn't know my manager was following me. After I walked through the door, without looking, I reached behind me to close it. Instead of grabbing the door handle, I got a handful of his crotch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22035) - you deserved it (2375)
On 08/30/2011 at 12:46am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML
I agree, your life sucks (44814) - you deserved it (2505)
On 08/08/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I woke up to my mom washing the dishes completely naked. Sadly, I was more surprised by the fact she was doing the dishes than the fact that that she was strutting about in her birthday suit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25946) - you deserved it (1914)
On 08/01/2011 at 8:55am - intimacy - by notsurprised (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I discovered my mother went into the local pub where I work part time, got very drunk, and flashed her boobs at everyone. I found out when a picture was posted on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27830) - you deserved it (2102)
On 06/06/2011 at 9:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, I was sitting on the bus following a harrowing breakup. A boy of no more than 6 looked at me full of compassion and said, "Are you crying because you're ugly?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (36896) - you deserved it (4226) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/10/2011 at 10:56am - kids - by Hahapasdroleleptit - France
Today, as I was about to go in the bathroom, a girl walked out, shaking water off her hands. Some of it landed on my face, and I just wiped it off. Then she said to her friend who was waiting for her, "The sink's broken. Can I use your hand sanitizer?" So what landed on my face? FML
I agree, your life sucks (31193) - you deserved it (2063)
On 03/05/2011 at 5:15am - misc - by anon (man) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (14071) - you deserved it (66822)
On 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by Anon. (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. We are both virgins. After we kissed and I took down my pants, she screamed and said "That THING is going to break me." We never did it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35621) - you deserved it (4903)
On 01/16/2011 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19120) - you deserved it (1514)
On 01/03/2011 at 7:56pm - work - by cain001 (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Monday 20 May 2013
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