This member hasn't filled in the description.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
The rules are the rules
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.
Today, I was feeling down following a recent breakup. My dad tried to comfort me by patting me on the back and saying everyone goes through ups and downs, "Like when I found out your mum and I were having a boy." I'm their only son. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26827) - you deserved it (1515)
On 03/29/2013 at 6:18pm - misc - by Appelflap (man) - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)
Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (31244) - you deserved it (6115)
On 03/29/2013 at 5:36pm - love - by sarajj (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38161) - you deserved it (11653)
On 03/29/2013 at 1:18pm - misc - by fucked by sex ed (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I realized how badly medical education has ruined me when I couldn't enjoy erotic literature because of one subtle anatomy mistake the author made. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27065) - you deserved it (5616)
On 03/29/2013 at 10:19am - intimacy - by notagyno - Romania (Bucuresti)
Today, I spent the whole night and day painting a portrait of my girlfriend. Being proud of it, I sent it to her hoping she would appreciate it. I spent hours working on that picture only for her to reply with, "That's not me, is it?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (26530) - you deserved it (2684)
On 03/29/2013 at 7:12am - love - by artist (woman) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)
Today, I was chatting with a co-worker, and she mentioned she has trouble swallowing pills. I replied that I'm lucky, because I have next to no gag reflex. Half the guys at the other registers abruptly went silent, and I'm now being constantly hit on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27897) - you deserved it (11995)
On 03/28/2013 at 4:56pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)
Today, while on vacation, I think I met my soul-mate, and quite possibly the love of my life. My vacation is to celebrate my 8-year anniversary with my husband. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16131) - you deserved it (40875)
On 03/28/2013 at 12:24pm - love - by not funny but :( (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I found out I'm failing school. Why am I failing? Because I work 60 hours a week. Why do I work 60 hours a week? To pay for school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37929) - you deserved it (4048)
On 03/28/2013 at 10:26am - work - by school issues - United States
Today, I finished installing remote access CCTV cameras around my house due to the high rate of burglaries around my neighborhood. I turn it on to see my teenage son rubbing one out on the couch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29955) - you deserved it (16928)
On 03/28/2013 at 3:53am - intimacy - by couch_potato (man) -
Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML
I agree, your life sucks (59988) - you deserved it (5761)
On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)
Today, my husband called me, saying he was in the hospital with a friend who'd just broken his arm. Too bad I then heard a female voice in the background mutter, "She'll never buy that". FML
I agree, your life sucks (48596) - you deserved it (2555)
On 03/27/2013 at 3:55pm - love - by soontobesingle (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)
Today, I was violently throwing up due to severe morning sickness. My boyfriend looked at me, then turned and walked away. In the end, my daughter gave me some paper towel and her juice. My 18-month-old is more supportive of my pregnancy than her 30-year-old father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32072) - you deserved it (4808)
On 03/27/2013 at 3:34pm - misc - by InfamousLastWord (woman) - United States
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time. She's a screamer. Her dog must have thought I was attacking her, because he immediately came over and started savaging me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37480) - you deserved it (3200)
On 03/27/2013 at 2:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I almost lost my virginity at the age of 34. After years of putting off sex and waiting for marriage, the moment arrived. My new wife could't stop laughing at how small I am. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54162) - you deserved it (6553)
On 03/27/2013 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I casually mentioned to my mom that my boyfriend of two years and I were thinking about moving in together. She looked me dead in the eye and said if I ever moved out, she'd throw me out of the house. I'm confused. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23915) - you deserved it (1765)
On 03/27/2013 at 2:47am - misc - by Imafishyfishy (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
