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  • Town/Country : Dallas, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 31 January 1991 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1161
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About kerripjones : Just a Texas girl that loves to laugh :)

I'm also a college graduate (B.S. in chemistry)
I am a certified pharmacy tech.
I teach an anatomy lab.
I find chest hair incredibly sexy.
I have a welsh corgi named Napoleon and he has stolen what was left of my heart.
I have recently acquired a new doggie I have christened LBJ.
While he has caused quite a riff in my romantic relationship, I can't stop loving him.
(Him being the dog)
There are two little boys named Jack and Carter that are frequently "bad like their Aunt Kerri" that fill my heart and empty my wallet.
I enjoy cooking but I love baking.
I'm extremely competitive and don't understand the phrase, "it's just a game"
Losing is painful. Success is not an option but a guarantee.
I'm an open book; I have NO secrets.

If you'd like to know anything about me or talk, feel free to send me a message :)

kerripjones's page activity

Visits<b>bulletproof098</b> - 12 hours ago<b>maaj</b> - yesterday at 4:25am<b>spockadelic</b> - yesterday at 7:56pm<b>actuallythoo</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 12:50am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 10:28pm<b>chandler88</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 5:03pm<b>A07</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 1:53am<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 8:43am<b>baby4mommy</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 6:09pm<b>baseball27LD</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 1:30am<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 9:22pm<b>marshm610</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 9:27pm<b>kiante99</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 12:26pm<b>AsharKhan</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 11:49pm<b>SKITTLZ2000</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 1:40pm<b>Jfooza</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 1:19am<b>Supertramp94</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 7:22pm<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 5:34pm

Fucked!<b>spockadelic</b> - yesterday at 1:56am<b>chandler88</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 9:16am<b>RooPeanutButter</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 7:49am<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 2:00pm<b>dk1991</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 3:10pm<b>youngmuller1</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 9:16am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 7:25pm<b>je83185</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 8:18am<b>keiNan</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 4:36am<b>zjay</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 2:43pm<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 4:35am<b>sexyboi1985</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 10:59am<b>josh_avila9</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 3:36am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 8:37pm<b>thinblue32</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 6:32pm<b>kiss_me11</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 9:08pm<b>GodPart2</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 11:20pm<b>USA1776</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 5:18am

kerripjones's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of kerripjones's badges

kerripjones's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

Today, I got on the bus to go to work. I managed to get a seat, but an old lady who looked tired had to stand. I offered her my seat, but she glared at me, frowned and said, "Go fuck yourself." Everyone laughed as I sat there in dismay. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32924) - you deserved it (2327)

On 11/13/2014 at 7:21pm - misc - by JoshTheUnluckyFromKentucky - United States (California)

Today, after 3 months of no orgasms, I was in the shower, working to rectify that. As I was seconds away from coming, my dad loudly knocked on the door and demanded to know how much longer I was going to take. Probably another 3 months now, dad. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52525) - you deserved it (8869)

On 01/25/2014 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by sally - United States (Georgia)

Today, my mom asked me when I'm going to propose to my girlfriend. Not only was she in the room at the time, I've spent the whole week thinking of ways to break up with her without ending up in the hospital. 5ML


I agree, your life sucks (43689) - you deserved it (4878)

On 01/24/2014 at 10:11am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML


I agree, your life sucks (35073) - you deserved it (57121)

On 01/18/2014 at 5:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend told me that she is pregnant. I asked how it could be possible, since she's on birth control. She said she didn't know her antibiotics would interfere with it. She's a pharmacist. FML


I agree, your life sucks (61895) - you deserved it (8396)

On 01/11/2014 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dog has found a new game he likes. It involves him rolling around on my new bed sheets to build up static electricity and run and poke me with his nose so I get shocked. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44556) - you deserved it (5343)

On 12/28/2013 at 3:23am - animals - by honeybunny90 - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50292) - you deserved it (5003)

On 12/22/2013 at 10:36am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that I take long enough showers for my boyfriend to sleep with my sister and put everything back to normal before I get out. I found out when I needed more shampoo that was in a shopping bag in my room. FML


I agree, your life sucks (65249) - you deserved it (5416)

On 12/07/2013 at 4:55pm - intimacy - by mystery - United States (North Dakota)

Today, my wife made me a Sex Rewards Chart, where I get points by doing chores and such, and 50 points gets me some action. She refuses to even look at me if I haven't earned the points, and is contemplating sleeping alone in the guest room until I earn more points. FML


I agree, your life sucks (60934) - you deserved it (19065)

On 12/07/2013 at 9:55am - intimacy - by feiedbutter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I actually thought of faking my own death to get away from my girlfriend and her insane, overbearing family. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44324) - you deserved it (7249)

On 11/29/2013 at 10:37am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my family and I finished moving to Texas. As if that isn't bad enough, I'll have to introduce myself all over again to everyone I meet and explain that yes, my parents really did name me Lilypad. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47822) - you deserved it (3958)

On 11/28/2013 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I met the guy I've been talking to online for two years in real life. He tried to convince me to have his children because they would be average height. He's a midget and I'm 6'2". This is the most romantic thing anybody has ever said to me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44015) - you deserved it (5402)

On 11/28/2013 at 11:34am - love - by heightdifference (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML


I agree, your life sucks (62329) - you deserved it (4530)

On 11/23/2013 at 11:11am - misc - by I hate that game - United Kingdom (Wigan)

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