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kenzie101

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kenzie101

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 889
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About kenzie101 : I love reading this stuff. I get on everyday so swap down a message when you come by. See yal around!

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kenzie101's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was sleeping, I managed to knock down the curtains by my bed. That would explain the gash on my head and blood on my bed. FML

#19348769
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17820) - you deserved it (1825)

On 03/26/2012 at 12:31am - misc - by Ringo McDingo (man) - United States

Today, I was vomiting after an evening of drinking. My boyfriend was kind enough to hold my hair back while I spewed chunks into the toilet. Apparently he got bored though, because his hands made their way down to my boobs, which he started jiggling while singing Jingle Bells. FML

#19345098
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14411) - you deserved it (25229)

On 03/25/2012 at 2:04pm - health - by analeis (woman) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, I had a terrible nightmare involving zombies slashing and eating at my face. I woke up in terror and urine, and found the slashing was very real: it was my cat pawing my face for me to feed him. FML

#19344885
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21245) - you deserved it (3823)

On 03/25/2012 at 1:21pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I finally got the guts to text this cute girl at school. I started sending flirtatious texts, only to find out the hard way that she'd given me her boyfriend's number. FML

#19344485
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24045) - you deserved it (6626)

On 03/25/2012 at 12:06pm - love - by Mark Allan (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I wore my new Brazilian thong bikini to the pool for the first time. I was lying face down feeling so sexy, until flies started buzzing my butt. FML

#19344343
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8850) - you deserved it (32759)

On 03/25/2012 at 11:34am - misc - by BookBabe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that when my girlfriend said she gave up sex for lent, it was just with me and not my brother. FML

#19343817
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37565) - you deserved it (2483)

On 03/25/2012 at 9:11am - intimacy - by ohno - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

#19343662
362 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40166) - you deserved it (12380)

On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML

#19343644
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23299) - you deserved it (2975)

On 03/25/2012 at 7:59am - animals - by PicklesMcRaptor - United States (Florida)

Today, was the first day of my new job. My boss admitted that they hadn't cleaned the employee bathroom for over two months. My first task: clean the employee bathroom. FML

#19343109
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21611) - you deserved it (1748)

On 03/25/2012 at 3:12am - misc - by LesToiliettes - United States (Ohio)

Today, I kicked my dog's toy snake out of my way. Then I realised my dog doesn't have a toy snake. FML

#19342755
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29504) - you deserved it (3197)

On 03/25/2012 at 1:49am - animals - by uh-oh - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend wrote a song for me. As he was singing it to me I realized it was actually a breakup song. FML

#19342330
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29403) - you deserved it (2303)

On 03/25/2012 at 12:40am - love - by lil123 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I started my research project on horror stories and people's fascination with them. I did some research and wound up reading H.P. Lovecraft. On the upside, I can now pee more easily. On the downside, it's likely to be in my pants. FML

#19340135
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15320) - you deserved it (3779)

On 03/24/2012 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I was peppered with questions about my swollen eye and if I'd gotten into a fight. I couldn't bring myself to admit that I'd been brutally beaten into submission by a doorknob. FML

#19339919
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15624) - you deserved it (3275)

On 03/24/2012 at 5:07pm - health - by Stephen (man) - Sweden

Today, at my grandmother's funeral there was a fight about inheritance. It was my teenage daughters arguing about what they get when I die. FML

#19337842
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24468) - you deserved it (2567)

On 03/24/2012 at 9:20am - kids - by thammer - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was fooling around with my husband on the bed. I was excited as he lifted my arms up in a seductive way, only to roll deodorant under my armpits. FML

#19337633
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12733) - you deserved it (32547)

On 03/24/2012 at 8:14am - intimacy - by SG - United States



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