About kenzie101 : I love reading this stuff. I get on everyday so swap down a message when you come by. See yal around!
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kenzie101's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 05/24/2011 at 1:19am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I got pulled by a cop because I forgot to put my registration sticker on. I get nervous around authority and have nervous shakes. I ripped the registration sticker 3 times trying to put it on. The cop then gave me a ticket for "Improper Equipment". FML
by Cody / 04/30/2011 at 2:13am / United States / Transportation
Today, I bought myself a brand-new 52" flatscreen. It was only in my house for 2 hours before my toddler had a tantrum, threw a toy right into the screen and wrecked it beyond repair. I paid to have a nice TV for 2 hours. FML
by ac32 / 04/11/2011 at 12:05pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by imsadnow / 01/31/2011 at 3:01pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
Today, my entire family of five is sharing one roll of toilet paper. My parents refuse to buy any, because my father can get it free from his work. He's forgotten to bring any home every day without fail for the past seven days. FML
by Anonymous / 01/11/2011 at 12:09pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, I was caring for a bird that had flown into my window. I thought the poor thing wouldn't make it, when it shit in my hand, flew into my neck, then around my living room for ages before I could manage to get it out of the window. FML
Today, I was running the track at my school. My crush of two years was running in front of me, so I decided to catch up and finally talk to her. When I caught up, the only thing I could think to say was, "What's your name?" even though I already knew. She replied, "Natalie". Her name is Melissa. FML
by Anonymous / 11/19/2010 at 7:49pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
by mydadsawsooomuch / 11/17/2010 at 8:26am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up to two text messages from my mother. The first said, "You could've had this for breakfast. How do you like your eggs?" The next text was a picture message of her naked. I think it was meant to be sent to her boyfriend. FML
by traumatized4life / 11/04/2010 at 3:32pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/03/2010 at 1:14pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, it was my first day as a mailman. One of the houses got a bunch of cards, and the owner coincidentally opened the door as I arrived. So I said to the owner that someone in the house must really be popular. He replied, "She died this Tuesday." FML
by Username / 10/25/2010 at 7:03am / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/23/2010 at 5:07am / Australia (Victoria) / Love
by wearingshorts / 08/28/2010 at 12:54am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by perfectlybrokenx / 08/24/2010 at 12:21am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
- 1Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 2Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 3Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say…