kenyalovesarah

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Offline (the 10/08/2014 at 9:44pm)

kenyalovesarah

10Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1100
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About kenyalovesarah : Created an account out of boredom, but i love fml. I love alice in wonderland, hemp bracelets, waterskiing, saw movies, board games, cuddling, african safaris, scuba diving, psychology, and outdoor adventures. Message me if you want, were both bored anyways.p.s I dont have a kik or any of those other social networks so please dont ask. thanks.

kenyalovesarah's page activity

Visits<b>stingray112</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 12:41am<b>Leo619</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 3:02pm<b>silentnick</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 11:02pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 11:23am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 9:48am<b>hullarms</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 10:22am<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 2:40pm<b>ThatGingerKid56</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 1:08pm<b>legendairy3000</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 4:45pm<b>daveydavidson111</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 8:19am<b>Cian_1</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 7:47pm<b>rjc490</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 12:07am<b>ThuNDeY</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 1:51am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 4:22pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 10:34pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 12:37am<b>JaimeFlores96</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 12:49am<b>jojimugo</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 10:05pm

Fucked!<b>silentnick</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 5:02am<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 8:40pm<b>legendairy3000</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 10:45pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 6:37am<b>Manosapo</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 5:34am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 4:39am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 2:17am<b>Stazza11</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 10:17pm

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kenyalovesarah's favorite FMLs

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

by Madster15 / 09/15/2013 at 2:05am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to the movies with my husband and our 6-year-old son. My husband kept stealing popcorn from the guy next to him, to the point where the guy punched him in the face. The movie was stopped, the police were called, and my son is now inconsolable. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2013 at 3:32pm / Iceland (Gullbringusysla) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML

by lifesucks0925 / 09/06/2013 at 3:01am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I came home to find my housemate cowering in the lounge corner, sobbing, hugging a bag of chips while the automatic vacuum cleaner gently bumped into him. Apparently he "mistakenly" put magic mushrooms in his sandwich instead of peanut butter. FML

by down trodden / 09/05/2013 at 3:45am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom is convinced that my cat is the reincarnation of Vincent van Gogh. Why? He sleeps under my sunflowers and is a ginger tabby cat. FML

by KatVanGogh / 08/25/2013 at 9:16pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, my 50-year-old dad was in a foul mood after taking an online test that put him in Slytherin house instead of Ravenclaw where he "belongs" because he's "so smart". FML

by thanksad / 08/22/2013 at 9:38pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I did something I'd always wanted to do: I went swimming with dolphins. It was really fun, until I went to kiss the dolphin, and she slipped her tongue half into my mouth. FML

by violated ._. / 08/22/2013 at 6:45pm / United States / Animals

Today, I watched TV in the early morning. I was watching The Ring, and when the scene came on where the girl is crawling out of the TV, my dad grabbed my shoulders from behind me out of nowhere, causing me to shriek like a little bitch. I don't know how long he waited to do that. FML

by insomniac x2 / 08/15/2013 at 3:56pm / Mexico (Nuevo Leon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2013 at 5:11am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, my mother yelled and yelled at me until I apologized to our cat for not petting him when he sat on my lap. FML

by wekasdjkasldasdkasdzcawqe / 08/07/2013 at 4:55pm / Sweden / Animals

Today, because I refused to shave off what my wife calls my "pedo 'stache", she painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van. FML

by Anonymous / 07/28/2013 at 12:59am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, our cat died. My five-year-old tried to flush him down the toilet. FML

by JamiesMom / 05/13/2013 at 12:29am / United States (Michigan) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while sitting in my Forensic Psychology class, my professor listed all of the main traits that indicate someone may very well be a sociopath. Every single trait described my fiancé perfectly. FML

by Getmeout / 05/31/2012 at 2:50am / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2010 at 2:02am / United States (New York) / Intimacy