About ken29 : I'm just your average, everyday Pokémon Master. Moustaches are cool.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, at a party I told this guy that I really liked his pirate costume. Turns out he wasn't wearing a costume, his eye was shot out with a bebe gun. This explains the eye patch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10029) - you deserved it (26495)
On 02/21/2009 at 9:33am - misc - by story of my life. - Switzerland (Zurich)
Today, I was home alone tanning in my backyard which is fairly secluded. I took my top off and laid there for awhile before I looked over and saw the UPS guy standing at my gate with a package because nobody answered the door. I looked horrified and he said not to worry, he'd seen better. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34894) - you deserved it (6418)
On 02/18/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by mediocreboobs (woman) - United States (California)
Today, on campus, these really overly-happy people walking around with big signs saying "free hugs". When I walked towards them, their smiles faded, and they put their signs down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39505) - you deserved it (3318)
On 02/13/2009 at 4:51pm - misc - by shit's weak - United States (Indiana)
Today, my boyfriend told me he was going to take me out somewhere special, so I called in sick for work. Turns out he had made reservations for the restaurant I worked at. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26776) - you deserved it (6324)
On 02/11/2009 at 11:51am - misc - by seriously?! (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football locker room, I started to swing my penis around because it feels good and I was alone. Two minutes later the rest of the team hops into the shower with me. 30 dudes, one self-induced boner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8812) - you deserved it (60994)
On 02/10/2009 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by JLoistheBomb (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I have been reading FML for 12 hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29500) - you deserved it (9259)
On 01/31/2009 at 8:51am - misc - by ayw329 - United States (Illinois)
Today, I sliced my arm open on the weekend, patched it with a fabric bandaid. Had an allergic reaction to the bandaid, arm now swollen, blistering and keeping-me-awake itchy. Pharmacist's advice? "Oooh, that looks bad. Better put a bandaid on that." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17398) - you deserved it (1241)
On 01/20/2009 at 8:08pm - health - by sore - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I had to give a speech in front of my class and during my speech I had to say the words "But six"; however, because of my accent it sounded like "Butt sex". For the remainder of the day I was frequently asked about "Butt sex". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16116) - you deserved it (535)
On 01/13/2009 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by Explicit - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was putting a new lightbulb in when my wife walks into the room and says "you can't see a thing, i'll turn the light on for you". And she did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17676) - you deserved it (1405)
On 01/11/2009 at 11:35pm - misc - by Christoams - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was eating at a nice restaurant. Feeling curious, I daringly asked for the surprise "Maiden's Dream" dessert. The waiter came back with a banana between two balls of ice-cream on a plate, and no spoon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13101) - you deserved it (4911)
On 01/03/2009 at 3:38am - misc - by sm@rtie - Sent from mobile version
Today, I went to fill up my car. 500 metres before the petrol station, I saw a group of motorcyclists in my rear view mirror. I slowed down and pulled over to let them past. In fact, they were also going to fill up. 35 motorcyclists and 2 petrol pumps. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13745) - you deserved it (4920)
On 12/09/2008 at 2:01am - misc - by gui909 - Sent from mobile version
Today, I lost my cell phone. But found it again! And then dropped it in the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36525) - you deserved it (15612)
On 10/13/2008 at 4:30am - money - by enjoy -
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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