About ken29 : I'm just your average, everyday Pokémon Master. Moustaches are cool.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I was really sick. I had been sneezing all day and my skin had started to dry out. When my mom asked me if I needed anything, I immediately responded with "lotion and tissues," not realizing what I was suggesting. She then talked to me for 20 minutes about how "masturbation is okay." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18957) - you deserved it (1948)
On 05/20/2012 at 2:11am - intimacy - by sick and awkward - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was really sick. I had been sneezing all day and my skin had started to dry out. When my mom asked me if I needed anything, I immediately responded with "lotion and tissues," not realizing what I was suggesting. She then talked to me for 20 minutes about how "masturbation is okay." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18957) - you deserved it (1948)
On 05/20/2012 at 2:11am - intimacy - by sick and awkward - United States (Maryland)
Today, my girlfriend went in for a kiss too fast and broke my front tooth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17868) - you deserved it (1469)
On 05/20/2012 at 1:19am - misc - by slayerdeath - United States (Indiana)
Today, my girlfriend went in for a kiss too fast and broke my front tooth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17868) - you deserved it (1469)
On 05/20/2012 at 1:19am - misc - by slayerdeath - United States (Indiana)
Today, I tried to beat my dad to the car. I jumped over the steel cables in the parking structure and hit my head on a metal pipe, then bounced off the wires, and onto my back on the pavement. Good thing we were already at the hospital to visit my sick mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6529) - you deserved it (14419)
On 05/20/2012 at 12:06am - health - by Ouch (man) - United States (California)
Today, I tried to beat my dad to the car. I jumped over the steel cables in the parking structure and hit my head on a metal pipe, then bounced off the wires, and onto my back on the pavement. Good thing we were already at the hospital to visit my sick mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6529) - you deserved it (14419)
On 05/20/2012 at 12:06am - health - by Ouch (man) - United States (California)
Today, it was my birthday, and I woke up to my dad telling me that we're going to Disneyland. Apparently, by "we" he meant him and my mom. They did, however, make a point to say "happy birthday" before they left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22866) - you deserved it (1164)
On 05/19/2012 at 10:04pm - misc - by Schubey (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, it was my birthday, and I woke up to my dad telling me that we're going to Disneyland. Apparently, by "we" he meant him and my mom. They did, however, make a point to say "happy birthday" before they left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22866) - you deserved it (1164)
On 05/19/2012 at 10:04pm - misc - by Schubey (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, before I went into surgery, the patient next to me just finished the same procedure I was going to get. As he woke up in the recovery area 10 feet away, I was getting my final prep before the operation. On my way into the operating room I was comforted by his screams of agonizing pain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18090) - you deserved it (1172)
On 05/19/2012 at 6:02am - health - by lubey - United States (North Carolina)
Today, before I went into surgery, the patient next to me just finished the same procedure I was going to get. As he woke up in the recovery area 10 feet away, I was getting my final prep before the operation. On my way into the operating room I was comforted by his screams of agonizing pain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18090) - you deserved it (1172)
On 05/19/2012 at 6:02am - health - by lubey - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I woke up early for an important team meeting I needed to attend. I washed, got changed, and sat down to eat breakfast... I then woke up again, an hour late and covered in cereal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15349) - you deserved it (2770)
On 05/19/2012 at 4:03am - work - by themcdave - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)
Today, I woke up early for an important team meeting I needed to attend. I washed, got changed, and sat down to eat breakfast... I then woke up again, an hour late and covered in cereal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15349) - you deserved it (2770)
On 05/19/2012 at 4:03am - work - by themcdave - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)
Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17538) - you deserved it (3450)
On 05/18/2012 at 10:41pm - money - by me (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17538) - you deserved it (3450)
On 05/18/2012 at 10:41pm - money - by me (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, after weeks of sorting, inspecting, and waiting, my high school's yearbooks were distributed. I'd searched carefully for photo errors and was proud to say there were none. That is, until someone told me that a boy on the last page was flipping the camera the bird. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11213) - you deserved it (2805)
On 05/18/2012 at 5:50pm - misc - by ooh cat - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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