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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I lied to my crush telling him I can play the piano. To 'prove' it, I recorded a video on my phone of a girl playing a beautiful piece. After I sent it, I realized my mouse cursor was in the center of the page the entire time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1989) - you deserved it (34822)
On 02/21/2010 at 2:41am - misc - by Piano999 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I grounded my daughter for putting play doh in the toaster. She's 17 and got into Columbia early admissions. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18649) - you deserved it (3412)
On 02/19/2010 at 1:18am - misc - by grrrrrr (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I realised I know the map on World of Warcraft better than the map of my own country. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5320) - you deserved it (28089)
On 02/18/2010 at 1:05pm - misc - by DLS - United States (Vermont)
Today, I got my first facebook friend request in 4 months. I also got a message in my inbox. The message said: "Sorry, I thought you were someone else. Just ignore my friend request." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38088) - you deserved it (5331)
On 08/13/2009 at 1:21pm - misc - by Jamie (woman) - Denmark (Staden Kobenhavn)
Today, I was at a clothing store. I tried on a dress, but decided it was too much for me. Taking it off, I realize my hair was tangled in the big security button. The employees had to bring me to the front of the store, lay me on the counter, and take the button out in front of a laughing crowd. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31408) - you deserved it (2679)
On 08/12/2009 at 8:10pm - misc - by ForeverEmbarrassed (woman) - United States (California)
Today, as a supervisor at a water park, several clients came up to me and complained about a topless girl in our wave pool. I found the girl, called her out, and politely told her that she was not allowed in the pool without a top. "She" was a fat 15 year old boy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42571) - you deserved it (5204)
On 08/12/2009 at 4:13pm - misc - by auslander (man) - Switzerland (Zurich)
Today, while teaching swim lessons, a boy was holding a noodle and claimed it was his fishing rod. Trying to be fun, I grabbed on and told him to "reel" me in. He then yells out 'YAY, I caught a whale!'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34440) - you deserved it (8391)
On 08/12/2009 at 1:02pm - kids - by guard35 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my 15-year-old daughter asked for a ride to her boyfriend's house. It's the same house I've been driving her to for sleepovers with her friend "Kate" for two years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28132) - you deserved it (35263)
On 08/12/2009 at 12:14pm - kids - by anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my cousin came over. I left my iPod on shuffle in the room we were in as I left to go to the bathroom. When I came back she was jamming out to "My Dick" by Mickey Avalon. She won't stop singing it and her mom is coming over to pick her up in an hour. She's 4. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10284) - you deserved it (29653)
On 08/11/2009 at 11:34pm - kids - by SomeDJ (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my boyfriend sent me a text saying to call him. When I did, it went straight to voicemail. It was a recording of him breaking up with me. He broke up with me over the phone, without even talking to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44537) - you deserved it (1920)
On 08/11/2009 at 10:05pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had a horrible breakup with my girlfriend of two years. Depressed, I changed my Facebook status to, "Hate me today, hate me tomorrow, hate me for all the things I didn't do for you." My ex commented, "Give me an orgasm?" Five of my friends, including my mom, liked this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38982) - you deserved it (15124)
On 08/11/2009 at 2:40am - love - by JazzSpazz (man) - United States (California)
Today, I found out why my boyfriend gets so upset when I make jokes about him and his best guy friend being lovers. It's because they are. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51311) - you deserved it (6155)
On 08/10/2009 at 12:31pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my mom drove me to football practice. On the way she told me that she thought I was gay and that my friend was my lover. After 15 agonizing minutes of this, we get to my practice only to be greeted by my shirtless friend wearing a pink bandana saying "Man, you hit me hard last night." FML
I agree, your life sucks (62084) - you deserved it (4824)
On 08/10/2009 at 3:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend came over so that we could have some "fun". It turns out, his idea of foreplay is squishing my breasts together and making them talk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42702) - you deserved it (6108)
On 07/28/2009 at 6:28pm - intimacy - by notsexy (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I sent a forward to everyone in my phonebook saying, "HOUSE PARTY-NO PARENTS, LOTS OF ALCOHOL, MAYBE A CHANCE TO HOOK UP." I then got a reply from my mom saying, "I'm probably the only one that would show up." Even my mom thinks I'm a loser, and I'm now grounded for 3 weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6955) - you deserved it (59359)
On 07/26/2009 at 11:25am - misc - by racchhh (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
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