Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

keke

Search for a member

keke

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 49222
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

keke's page activity

Visits<b>ryan1268</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 4:20pm<b>JellyJace</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 3:55pm<b>finiclepie</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 7:34pm<b>trose128</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 11:21pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 1:56am<b>jofukurself</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 4:30pm<b>Brino21395</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 4:50pm<b>amyx3_</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 5:09pm<b>HighLlama</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 11:12am<b>ImAFaker</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 3:07pm<b>Terzy</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 12:20am<b>tellyc</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 12:34am<b>mehidontknow</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 12:23am<b>Aspireworks</b> - the 12/22/2013 at 4:25am<b>P_B683</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 5:01am<b>shellz15</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 8:17am<b>stilysm</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 10:23am<b>unlucky_jazmyn</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 4:54pm

keke's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

keke's favorite FMLs

Today, I had gone to the store and bought a new wallet. 5 minutes later a security guard asks for my receipt. Turns out I had dropped my receipt. Some guy had picked it up and pretended I had stole his wallet. The guard confiscated my wallet because the guy had "his" receipt to prove it. FML

#409168
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95200) - you deserved it (7671)

On 03/17/2009 at 8:16am - money - by Recon (man) - Switzerland (Basel-Stadt)

Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML

#405303
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (136937) - you deserved it (36912)

On 03/17/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by princess (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was sifting through my parents old home movies. I put in one and was horrified to see my parents having sex. I immediately ejected the tape and looked at the label. It said "Bermuda, 1989". They've told me I was conceived in Bermuda around that time. I've seen my own conception. FML

#391986
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (176708) - you deserved it (34505)

On 03/16/2009 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by ihatevideos (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I checked my Facebook to find I had been tagged in a bunch of photos from a party I had attended last night. On each picture I had a comment from my mom saying, "You're grounded." FML

#322289
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30426) - you deserved it (76063)

On 03/14/2009 at 2:22pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Virginia)

Today, I checked my Facebook to find I had been tagged in a bunch of photos from a party I had attended last night. On each picture I had a comment from my mom saying, "You're grounded." FML

#322289
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30426) - you deserved it (76063)

On 03/14/2009 at 2:22pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was writing a very important email to my college professor. I went upstairs for something and came back down to send it. I later asked him today why he hadn't responded to which he said "I'm flattered...but can't." My roommate had added "love you xxx" at the end of the email. FML

#315906
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54008) - you deserved it (7023)

On 03/14/2009 at 1:27am - misc - by dntstopmenow (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, my best friend set me up on a blind date with someone he said was very hot. I'm not exactly what you call fit, so I haven't been dating lately. As soon as I got to the restaurant, I spotted the girl. She looked me up and down, said, "You have GOT to be kidding me" and left. FML

#290842
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64091) - you deserved it (6845)

On 03/12/2009 at 8:38pm - love - by tomtomcutiepoof (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I called a priest "lame". He responded jokingly with "God will smite you!" I laughed and walked out the door. I tripped and broke my ankle. FML

#280211
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33196) - you deserved it (96774)

On 03/12/2009 at 8:07am - health - by lolzor (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one smallest penis I have ever seen." FML

#273753
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68003) - you deserved it (8589)

On 03/11/2009 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a very nice restaurant. I thought it would be a good place to pop the question. I gave the ring to the waiter and asked him to put it on her dessert plate. When she saw it she picked it up, put it down and said "no". Then she started to eat the dessert. FML

#211586
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82022) - you deserved it (4892)

On 03/04/2009 at 9:18pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Florida)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a very nice restaurant. I thought it would be a good place to pop the question. I gave the ring to the waiter and asked him to put it on her dessert plate. When she saw it she picked it up, put it down and said "no". Then she started to eat the dessert. FML

#211586
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82022) - you deserved it (4892)

On 03/04/2009 at 9:18pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Florida)

Today, my wife and I were driving to the gas station, she let me out before she pulled up to the pumps because I had to buy some things from the store. I returned to see my wife proudly filling the tank. Smiling, she told me that diesel was cheaper than regular gas. We don't own a diesel car. FML

#209822
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71151) - you deserved it (8003)

On 03/04/2009 at 7:04pm - misc - by Damn_her (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I had sex with my girlfriend. Being the stud that I am, after a short time I turned to her and said "You think you're ready for a round two?" She replied "No, but I do think I'm ready for the rest of round one." FML

#204444
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22730) - you deserved it (103516)

On 03/04/2009 at 2:03am - intimacy - by saddude (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, for my two-year anniversary I got my girlfriend a very expensive diamond necklace. She got me male enhancement pills. FML

#197066
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (143058) - you deserved it (16178)

On 03/03/2009 at 4:40pm - intimacy - by eaa145 (man) - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • FML's Thanksgiving Special: TGS
  • As many of us know through popular culture, today is Thanksgiving in the US. Come on, we’ve all seen a TV show involving a Thanksgiving dinner or plans to do so that have gone awry due to one of the main…

Wednesday 26 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: