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keitorinm

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keitorinm

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 31 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 611
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About keitorinm : I <3 music!
Especially house xD
I'm usually on Fmylife when I should be paying attention in math xD
And remember:
If the world gives you lemons, make orange juice. Then sit back and let the world wonder how the heck you did it ;)

Feel free to message me ^.^

keitorinm's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

keitorinm's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad found my "list". 32 guys, 4 girls. Colour coded as to who I would sleep with again and who I wouldn't, who were virgins, etc. He complimented me on my "organizational skills." FML

#11944390
336 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14629) - you deserved it (54723)

On 07/17/2010 at 3:34pm - intimacy - by reckless (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my looks alone made a girl cry. FML

#8893190
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28631) - you deserved it (4395)

On 03/07/2010 at 1:54pm - misc - by SadFace (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I started work as the head engineer for a big civil engineering project. I met the rest of my team, in particular the environmental engineer who I'll need to get along with the most. As it turns out, I took her virginity when we were freshmen in college. She still thinks I'm an asshole. FML

#7565931
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11577) - you deserved it (33838)

On 01/25/2010 at 8:32am - love - by CivE (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I started work as the head engineer for a big civil engineering project. I met the rest of my team, in particular the environmental engineer who I'll need to get along with the most. As it turns out, I took her virginity when we were freshmen in college. She still thinks I'm an asshole. FML

#7565931
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11577) - you deserved it (33838)

On 01/25/2010 at 8:32am - love - by CivE (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I tried to get my girlfriend of nine months to have oral sex with me. She was eating a hot dog. She then said, "If you ask me again, this is what I'll do to you." She then bit the hot dog in half. FML

#6989105
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9149) - you deserved it (33309)

On 12/28/2009 at 5:16am - intimacy - by Dontworryaboutit (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend told me he likes having sex during my period because it makes him feel like he stabbed a small animal to death. FML

#6968124
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38748) - you deserved it (4124)

On 12/27/2009 at 2:13am - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was with her. No, let me correct myself. Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was in her. FML

#4574797
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70256) - you deserved it (10557)

On 08/16/2009 at 2:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went out for dinner with my parents where they asked me if I was still dating my boyfriend so I answered no. They quickly responded by saying, "Oh so you finally got rid of that douchebag? It's not like he was getting anywhere in life anyways." I answered no because he's my fiancé now. FML

#4434889
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44211) - you deserved it (8564)

On 08/10/2009 at 8:21pm - misc - by NewFiancee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom drove me to football practice. On the way she told me that she thought I was gay and that my friend was my lover. After 15 agonizing minutes of this, we get to my practice only to be greeted by my shirtless friend wearing a pink bandana saying "Man, you hit me hard last night." FML

#4421825
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75924) - you deserved it (6566)

On 08/10/2009 at 3:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was drinking at the local pub and started talking to a really cute guy. I bent down to pick up my bag and the second I did, I felt like I was going to throw up. I clamped my mouth shut in the vain hope that I could block it but as I stood back up, vomit sprayed out through my nose. FML

#4227186
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42038) - you deserved it (11015)

On 08/02/2009 at 9:40am - misc - by soembarrassed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I had to play the role of superman in a production on stage. They had to stuff my underwear because my 'thing' wasn't big enough. FML

#2769644
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73620) - you deserved it (6689)

On 06/10/2009 at 11:46am - misc - by superman_not (man) - United Kingdom (Perth and Kinross)

Today, I got a call from my child's preschool saying that "Mindy keeps saying she sits on her daddy's lap and plays with his peter." My daughter meant 'puter, as in computer. Now the school is worried my husband is a child molester. FML

#1704585
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62793) - you deserved it (2762)

On 05/06/2009 at 9:43pm - misc - by Gumfanatic302 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
522 comments

I agree, your life sucks (244269) - you deserved it (32229)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went out for coffee with a guy I really like. We met up at the local café, and decided to sit at a counter in front of the window. We talked and flirted for a while. Then he kissed me, and while he was kissing me someone banged on the window. It was my parents. They didn't know I'm gay. FML

#520285
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90776) - you deserved it (32947)

On 03/21/2009 at 10:38pm - love - by clementine_k (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I woke up at three in the morning when two cops busted in the door to my apartment and a frantic voice on my cellphone saying "Sir? Sir? Are you all right? Sir?" Turns out I had been having a nightmare and dreamed I called 911. I actually did. FML

#440568
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67981) - you deserved it (8122)

On 03/18/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by Miller_Time (man) - United States



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