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keitorinm

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keitorinm

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 31 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 580
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About keitorinm : I <3 music!
Especially house xD
I'm usually on Fmylife when I should be paying attention in math xD
And remember:
If the world gives you lemons, make orange juice. Then sit back and let the world wonder how the heck you did it ;)

Feel free to message me ^.^

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keitorinm's favorite FMLs

Today, my mum gave me half-raw chicken for dinner. After she refused to cook it again, I threw it away saying that I didn't want to get salmonella. She told to be more grateful, and that I was an idiot for trying to use salmonella as an excuse because 'it's chicken, not salmon'. FML

#17610443
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36901) - you deserved it (3365)

On 08/29/2011 at 4:33am - health - by SoupCanoe - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

#17589386
676 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30142) - you deserved it (49149)

On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States

Today, my husband threw out all of the spices in the cupboard. When I asked him why he said, "Our cat was named Spicy and I can't stand to look at them." Our recently deceased cat's name was Dicey. FML

#17283376
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29341) - you deserved it (2860)

On 07/28/2011 at 2:18am - animals - by Tali (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out my boyfriend can name each and every Pokémon, but can't remember my birthday. FML

#17090156
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35991) - you deserved it (8615)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:47am - love - by Ignored - United States (Texas)

Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her before she called the cops to say that her books were trying to eat her face off. FML

#16932520
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31386) - you deserved it (3510)

On 07/01/2011 at 3:41am - misc - by ugh annoying - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML

#16879378
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60564) - you deserved it (7452)

On 06/27/2011 at 9:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML

#16879378
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60564) - you deserved it (7452)

On 06/27/2011 at 9:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my son is going through a rebellious phase. He's taken to wearing leather and chains, listening to death metal music all day in his room alone, and screaming at me in public places. He was fired from his part-time job for swearing at customers. My son is 29 years old. FML

#16876528
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42111) - you deserved it (12363)

On 06/27/2011 at 2:26am - kids - by SheenaL (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, a friend posted the Facebook status "Ahhh... relief." Trying to be funny, I replied "Why? Did you just poop?" A few hours later, I read her previous posts and found out her dad's in the hospital having heart surgery. Now everyone thinks I'm a heartless dick. FML

#16867532
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13913) - you deserved it (46473)

On 06/26/2011 at 4:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a long and heartfelt message. He responded with "tl; dr". FML

#16540181
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26123) - you deserved it (6033)

On 06/07/2011 at 12:43am - love - by Maddie110110 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a long and heartfelt message. He responded with "tl; dr". FML

#16540181
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26123) - you deserved it (6033)

On 06/07/2011 at 12:43am - love - by Maddie110110 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while giving a brief presentation at work, I blanked out on what I was going to say. I tried to make a joke and tell them I'd had a brain fart, but all I managed to say was "I farted". Well, at least they all laughed. FML

#14211006
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28420) - you deserved it (7865)

On 12/15/2010 at 6:57am - work - by Mike -

Today, at an Aunt's wake, my five year old son walked up to the coffin, and, with the whole family around him, exclaimed, "Well that's good, I was wondering where she's been." FML

#13635730
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27125) - you deserved it (3018)

On 10/29/2010 at 4:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

#13005397
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38008) - you deserved it (9634)

On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)

Today, I was working as a camp counselor helping a five year old girl. I heard her mumble, "My grandpa is getting married on Saturday." I enthusiastically replied and told her how exciting that was! Only after did I realize that she said 'buried'. FML

#12738391
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25791) - you deserved it (8189)

On 08/25/2010 at 12:32pm - misc - by counselor - United States (Massachusetts)



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