keisha_paul

Search for a member

Offline (the 10/07/2015 at 6:16am)

keisha_paul

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 30 June 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 675
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About keisha_paul : My name isn't actually Keisha. It was a nickname I got in middle school. And now I can't change my username so I'm stuck with it. FML

keisha_paul's page activity

Visits<b>tj1540</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 9:26am<b>maro300</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 8:36pm<b>angelk19</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 12:52am<b>Frenchtony</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 1:30pm<b>retroSublime</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 1:33am<b>youremyhouse</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 12:39am<b>douglas423</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 11:57pm<b>Taylor22294</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 6:44pm<b>kittina</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 4:21pm<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 1:22am<b>trex83</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 12:38pm<b>tacojauns</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 6:42am<b>jackaced</b> - the 05/17/2013 at 6:11pm<b>epyk_pryncess</b> - the 03/27/2013 at 6:16pm

keisha_paul's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of keisha_paul's badges

keisha_paul's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my shut in of a daughter why she was sniffing black pepper. She said she was practicing to make her sneezes sound like coughs, thereby decreasing the likelihood of someone talking to her. FML

by My Daughter Fails at Life / 09/25/2015 at 9:17pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said, "Sure, but not yet." As we've been together for five years, I was a bit confused, but she cleared that up with, "Not until your dad has died, I don't want him to ruin my wedding with a bad toast." FML

by inheritance / 05/05/2015 at 10:44am / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Love

Today, I had to explain to my rabidly religious brother how two transvestites can buy fish at Petco while he's buying the same fish at the same Petco, and it doesn't equate to hitting on him. It's been two hours, and he's still sitting outside my door reading Bible verses and praying aggressively. FML

by mademoiselle meurtre / 04/12/2015 at 10:51pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, after seven people at work approaching me and asking me if I was 'that lad from the paper', I picked one up to see what they were talking about. Turns out my doppelganger is a man who brutally murdered his older brother last year. FML

by definatelynotamurderer / 03/03/2015 at 9:01am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, my wedding venue called and canceled our reservation because we were double booked with a spaghetti bingo night, which they felt was more important. FML

by looking4newvenue / 02/23/2015 at 3:49pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a job interview where I was interrupted for using the word creative because there is "only one creator". FML

by IAMALITAHA / 06/27/2014 at 2:11am / United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne) / Work

Today, I met a really nice girl at a club, and we went back to my place. I was finally going to lose my virginity, but just as she started kissing me, I panicked and ended up fainting. When I came to, I was still clothed, and she was long gone. FML

by ohai ur hawt, wanna fuzzzZzZZzzZzz / 04/04/2014 at 7:20pm / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Love

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend when all of a sudden he stops, grabs my breasts with both hands, makes circular motions with them, and yells, "Daniel-san! Wax on! Wax off! Wax on! Wax off!", killing my orgasm dead. FML

by KarateKid76 / 12/04/2013 at 10:19pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML

by don'tdrinkthat / 11/03/2013 at 5:27pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, my grandmother called me in a fit of panic because her new neighbors are black. So is my fiancé, whom she is supposed to meet tomorrow. FML

by secretsmakefriends / 10/15/2013 at 5:43pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents dropped by my new house, and my mother offered to tidy up for me while I was out. After they left, I noticed that her "tidying up" included throwing out all the pictures of my girlfriend and replacing them with pictures of herself. FML

by Anonymous / 10/15/2013 at 4:52pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, in revenge for me pulling the old salt-in-the-soda prank on him, my dad showed up at my college dressed in a tight blouse and miniskirt, demanding that I come home early with him. I think I'm going to be lynched next time I go to class. FML

by HSampsON / 10/13/2013 at 5:20pm / Niger (Niamey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my coworkers that I was going on a date tonight so they would think I have a social life. One of them spotted me while I was eating alone at McDonalds. FML

by CreamGravy / 10/06/2013 at 9:54am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my bully made me cry once again. It's been going on for weeks. I don't know who to turn to; I can't say anything because I'd get into even more trouble. He even stole my Nintendo 3DS and won't give it back. My bully is my girlfriend's son. He's 10. FML

by PickedOnByDamien / 10/02/2013 at 4:12am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML

by NestHead / 10/01/2013 at 1:32pm / Russian Federation (Moscow City) / Animals