Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

kee_breezy32

Offline (yesterday at 6:14pm) | Search for a member

kee_breezy32

5Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2984
  • Number of comments : 121
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 41 posted

About kee_breezy32 : I still love reading people's tragic stories :O

kee_breezy32's page activity

Visits<b>MissEris</b> - 20 hours ago<b>ayejaye14</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 1:41am<b>BeastBruh</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 11:53pm<b>twerkthemdrums</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 10:21am<b>crazytwinsmom</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 2:06am<b>Pstraka6</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 4:01pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 3:42pm<b>Jaidatazzy</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 12:12am<b>kidinkbaby</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 3:23pm<b>jonathan7777</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 11:28am<b>steve1122</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 4:42pm<b>BFons</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 3:51pm<b>terryaly</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 3:40pm<b>bushytomatoe</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 3:17pm<b>Martinv9</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 7:21pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 9:49pm<b>RocketmanWelbz</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 9:38pm<b>ZynexFin</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 11:24pm

Liked!<b>MissEris</b> - 14 hours ago<b>Edogg215</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 11:15pm<b>kkkkkkkkkka</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 9:57pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 6:29am<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 4:25am

kee_breezy32's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of kee_breezy32's badges

kee_breezy32's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend of two years asked me why I would never tie her shoes for her. I confessed to her my deep hatred of feet. Later, I woke up from a nap next to my girlfriend. With her feet in my mouth. FML

#21321894
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31906) - you deserved it (5621)

On 12/22/2014 at 3:05am - love - by ScottyB - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, immediately after being informed of the sketchy activities that take place in our store parking lot after dark, I'm handed an orange vest and told to go out there to retrieve carts. FML

#21321892
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26843) - you deserved it (2080)

On 12/22/2014 at 2:53am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, a customer came in with a laptop smashed beyond repair. She asked if we could recover her files, but thanks to my idiot boss' new store policy I had to ask her a bunch of questions, including if she had tried "turning it on and off". She stared at me, speechless, like I was a complete moron. FML

#21321539
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34503) - you deserved it (3737)

On 12/21/2014 at 2:08pm - work - by anonix (man) - Canada

Today, I took a late-night shower. When I got out afterwards, the bathroom door was ajar, and I could have sworn I heard the faint patter of footsteps in the kitchen. "It's probably the cat," I told myself. Then I went upstairs and saw my cat asleep on my bed. FML

#21320813
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31688) - you deserved it (2409)

On 12/20/2014 at 9:41am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my mom texted me and asked what I was up to. In response, I joked, "Dancing on the dining room table, waving dad's Calvin Klein's in the air, and shooting bullets into her bedroom floor." Not only did the cops show up, but now I'm grounded for two weeks for being, "deceptively believable." FML

#21314000
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31712) - you deserved it (5369)

On 12/08/2014 at 7:38pm - misc - by #goodbyelife - United States

Today, I found out I have sodium fluoride poisoning. Apparently, my water has a high level of sodium fluorine. I've been drinking much more water lately trying to be healthier. FML

#21313951
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29924) - you deserved it (2286)

On 12/08/2014 at 6:23pm - health - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my sister turned the volume on my phone way up and changed the ringtone to a woman's blood-curdling scream. I found this out when she called my phone at 2am as I slept next to it. I pissed my pants and fell out of bed screaming in terror. I'll never hear the end of this. FML

#21313211
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37821) - you deserved it (3615)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:54pm - kids - by terdberglerforlyfe (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, while clearing stuff out of the basement, I found my ex-wife's old electronic diary device from the '90s. I found the charger, powered it up, and had soon read all about out she'd been cheating on me for almost half our marriage with the guy she's now married to. FML

#21313160
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38445) - you deserved it (3268)

On 12/07/2014 at 2:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Galway)

Today, I farted while I was in the car with my driving instructor and my partner. They couldn't hear it, but it smelled so bad that my instructor thought there was a gas leak, and he made us switch cars. FML

#21312925
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29882) - you deserved it (5908)

On 12/07/2014 at 1:15am - misc - by Gassy and sassy (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She was so excited that she had a severe asthma attack and ended up in hospital. Her answer was yes, but her parents won't let me anywhere near her now. They say I'm lucky they haven't sued me for "trying to kill her". FML

#21312768
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39989) - you deserved it (2257)

On 12/06/2014 at 7:56pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, while driving home, I swerved to avoid turning a duck and her babies into roadkill. Another car was coming around a sharp bend at the time and swerved to avoid hitting me. In the end, we both ran our cars off the road, and he took out several ducks in the process. FML

#21312517
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28104) - you deserved it (7186)

On 12/06/2014 at 12:04pm - misc - by newly passed, newly grassed (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I broke a glass case containing my pet scorpions. I still can't find them. FML

#21312200
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27458) - you deserved it (13861)

On 12/05/2014 at 8:32pm - animals - by sting - United States (California)

Today, I bought my cat a fun toy at the one of a kind craft show. It has catnip in it, which he loves. He flipped out, so I took it away. He won't stop trying to break into the cupboard I put it in. My cat has a drug problem. FML

#21310320
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28546) - you deserved it (5096)

On 12/02/2014 at 7:56pm - animals - by allykat - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I deleted a load of junk that was messing up my mother's computer. I don't know how I'm going to tell her I accidentally wiped out all of her wedding photos. FML

#21310063
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21360) - you deserved it (27809)

On 12/02/2014 at 12:02pm - misc - by not living happily ever after - United States (Virginia)

Today, my only child introduced his new girlfriend to me. He is 36 and has no children. She is 46 and has a pregnant daughter who she is very close with. I don't know if I'll ever be a grandfather, but in any case, my son is going to be one before me. FML

#21308718
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28372) - you deserved it (2300)

On 11/30/2014 at 12:29pm - kids - by Greatgrandpa (man) - Curacao



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: