kdm_km1

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Offline (the 12/05/2016 at 8:02pm)

kdm_km1

16Fucked!

kdm_km1
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 December 1984 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5763
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About kdm_km1 : I try to make each day as I intresting as I can, but work makes that hard sometimes. That said, I spend my free time playing sports, hunting/fishing, and hanging out with friends. Anything else you want to know just ask 😊

kdm_km1's page activity

Visits<b>Prashant0689</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 3:30am<b>mermaidkeels</b> - the 10/31/2016 at 6:05pm<b>Jesmassimo</b> - the 09/08/2016 at 10:50pm<b>2simz</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 12:44am<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 5:15pm<b>grifmelo</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 4:29pm<b>madissin</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 1:39am<b>kkorn051212</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 11:18pm<b>Jude64</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 4:41am<b>Jennaaay</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 11:53am<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 4:20pm<b>missa8604</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 10:02pm<b>dcs00</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 5:40pm<b>nyf137</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 11:11pm<b>ohmissjane</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 9:10am<b>charmingdisaster</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 7:19pm<b>Kitty1811</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 4:57pm<b>idefka</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 11:13pm

Fucked!<b>Jesmassimo</b> - the 09/07/2016 at 7:26pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 11:14pm<b>kkorn051212</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 5:18am<b>dcs00</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 11:40pm<b>js_0508</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 9:30am<b>ohmissjane</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 3:19am<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 6:44pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 2:11pm<b>asantos4</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 7:36am<b>_jessiepoohe_</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 6:57am<b>FiFiLovee</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 6:12am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 7:50pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 12:52am<b>TypicalDaniela</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 9:34pm

kdm_km1's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of kdm_km1's badges

kdm_km1's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm sitting in a public toilet when a guy kicks the door in and shoves a police badge in my face, screaming for me to tell him "the path of Lemmiwinks". After a whole minute of me shitting my balls off, he bursts into laughter and tells me I've been pranked. I was too embarrassed to report him. FML

by shitless88 / 08/19/2011 at 8:23pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got my tongue pierced, then went to a pet store. A clerk came up to ask if I needed help. I showed him I already had some fish, and said, "No thanks." He must have thought I was "special," as he bent down and in a baby voice, said "You got fishy? FISHY FISHY FISHY!" while poking the bag. FML

by aprilfools22 / 08/17/2011 at 4:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my little brother proudly informed me that he found a way to suck pool water up his asshole. FML

by Gross... / 08/16/2011 at 2:22am / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML

by Anonymous / 08/12/2011 at 6:40am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation

Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, telling him how much I loved him. His answer? "Less lovin' more humpin'." This happens every single time. FML

by fml / 08/12/2011 at 2:14am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

by ohcrap / 08/02/2011 at 12:58am / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, while driving in a funeral procession I was distracted, missed my turn and yelled "God dammit!" I'm the funeral director; the Priest was in the car with me as I led the funeral the wrong way. FML

by patrickalamo / 06/14/2011 at 10:23am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my co-worker finally gave me a check for the money he owes me. In the memo line, he wrote "for swallowing". Now I have to go cash it. FML

by Patrick R / 06/09/2011 at 12:01pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I used the staff toilets at school. As I sat down, I heard a sudden plop, followed by the stench of diarrhoea from the next cubicle. It was followed by a "I do apologise!" It was my English teacher. And we continued to chat. FML

by IPityTheStool / 06/09/2011 at 9:22am / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when he sweetly whispered in my ear "it's not gonna suck itself." FML

by Username / 06/07/2011 at 2:51am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my dad came to visit me. By visit I mean he arrived, took a huge smelly dump and left. This is the first time I've seen my dad in months. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2011 at 10:10am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sent my boyfriend a well thought out, steamy, and sexy sext message. His reply? "Three bidders for my drums on eBay! Makiiin' Monaaaay!" FML

by rileycrash / 05/19/2011 at 10:08pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was at Walmart with my mom, when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML

by nicknick2 / 05/18/2011 at 12:08pm / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a parent-teacher conference with my 8 year old son. He'd written "Chuck Norris" as the answer for every question on his test. FML

by yobruh / 05/17/2011 at 12:54am / Kids

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML

by Chels / 05/11/2011 at 1:17am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy