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kdm_km1

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kdm_km1

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 26 December 1984 (29 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1755
  • Number of comments : 42
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About kdm_km1 : I'm awesome. Just ask me.

kdm_km1's page activity

Visits<b>madellen</b> - 14 hours ago<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 2:52pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 1:19pm<b>Josiiee</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 1:38am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 10:06pm<b>Shiffy_Em</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 1:45pm<b>rimosah</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 11:52pm<b>rafaelc334</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 10:06am<b>ItsMissLia</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 6:48am<b>JustClaire95</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 5:13pm<b>mbonzo35</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 4:52am<b>tyoung94</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 11:01pm<b>aminasalah</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 5:40pm<b>marinaim</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 9:30am<b>gjikvtj</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:43pm<b>626boy</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:32pm<b>Shepy2000</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 1:25am<b>BarryMacockiner</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 6:20pm

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Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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kdm_km1's favorite FMLs

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

#19330918
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46621) - you deserved it (4527)

On 03/23/2012 at 1:55am - intimacy - by mrricecakes (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my fiancé, when he jumped up and viciously sat on my face. I then heard, smelled, and tasted the most violent, horrific fart known to man. I still can't get the taste out of my mouth, and he can't stop laughing. I'm getting married to this guy. FML

#19275580
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25533) - you deserved it (12550)

On 03/14/2012 at 1:18am - love - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out that my resume contained the word "masturbation" in the skills section, courtesy of a practical joke by my best friend. I have been using this CV unsuccessfully for over two months. FML

#19270252
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29102) - you deserved it (7283)

On 03/13/2012 at 8:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I realized that I am so sexually deprived that I get aroused when plugging my headphones into my computer. FML

#19268925
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23240) - you deserved it (7953)

On 03/13/2012 at 12:38am - intimacy - by Wow (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML

#19263580
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34756) - you deserved it (5442)

On 03/12/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Tristansefam1367 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML

#19222956
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25085) - you deserved it (7706)

On 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm - health - by Kayla - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML

#19085877
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28130) - you deserved it (2345)

On 02/15/2012 at 2:26pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML

#18744677
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49094) - you deserved it (46210)

On 01/08/2012 at 9:36am - intimacy - by omgwhyme (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I texted my boyfriend on the way to the hospital to tell him I needed stitches, after my brother's dog bit me on the breast. His response? "Pics or it didn't happen." FML

#18643236
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28304) - you deserved it (5006)

On 12/29/2011 at 10:48am - health - by OH COME ON (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML

#18398754
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31211) - you deserved it (3774)

On 11/30/2011 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML

#18370889
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37899) - you deserved it (9330)

On 11/27/2011 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he suddenly pulls out and says, "Pull my penis." So I pulled his penis and he farted. Then he started doing it again. FML

#18260975
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36224) - you deserved it (6878)

On 11/16/2011 at 12:27am - intimacy - by halloweed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35585) - you deserved it (18795)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML

#18145171
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62279) - you deserved it (4614)

On 11/03/2011 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)



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