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kdm_km1

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kdm_km1

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 26 December 1984 (29 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1764
  • Number of comments : 42
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About kdm_km1 : I'm awesome. Just ask me.

kdm_km1's page activity

Visits<b>madellen</b> - one hour ago<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 2:52pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 1:19pm<b>Josiiee</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 1:38am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 10:06pm<b>Shiffy_Em</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 1:45pm<b>rimosah</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 11:52pm<b>rafaelc334</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 10:06am<b>ItsMissLia</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 6:48am<b>JustClaire95</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 5:13pm<b>mbonzo35</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 4:52am<b>tyoung94</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 11:01pm<b>aminasalah</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 5:40pm<b>marinaim</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 9:30am<b>gjikvtj</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:43pm<b>626boy</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:32pm<b>Shepy2000</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 1:25am<b>BarryMacockiner</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 6:20pm

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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kdm_km1's favorite FMLs

Today, while sharing a few beers on the couch with my boyfriend, he drunkenly uttered the fateful words, "Babe, if I could suck my own dick, you'd be single as HELL." FML

#20426492
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51177) - you deserved it (7004)

On 12/27/2012 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by well, i am now (woman) - United States

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

#20163281
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47156) - you deserved it (5996)

On 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend of three years, whom I recently got engaged to, asked me to take a photo of my mother's boobs while she was sleeping so that he could see what mine would look like when I got older. FML

#20160220
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29759) - you deserved it (3455)

On 11/12/2012 at 8:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got a call from my son's school saying to pick him up because he'd shat his pants. He's in high school. FML

#20119263
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24822) - you deserved it (2517)

On 10/16/2012 at 4:07am - kids - by Mike - United States

Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML

#20110803
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33713) - you deserved it (5503)

On 10/10/2012 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend doggy-style. I was getting close when he suddenly blurts out, "Babe, you really need to bleach your asshole." FML

#20095626
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30535) - you deserved it (4902)

On 09/30/2012 at 7:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after eight months of unemployment, I finally started at my new night job. Shortly after walking in, my boss came up behind me, whispered "hooorse dicksss" in my ear, and walked off without another word. I am terrified. FML

#20094121
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21590) - you deserved it (1748)

On 09/29/2012 at 8:11pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML

#20071617
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23410) - you deserved it (1926)

On 09/14/2012 at 12:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my 43-year-old brother's obsession with Breaking Bad reached a new level of stupidity when he nearly got us beaten up by a bunch of meth-heads down by our local park. He went up to them with his shaved head and stupid hat, and tried to act all Walter White with them. FML

#20065827
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18223) - you deserved it (1789)

On 09/10/2012 at 2:06am - misc - by NotJessePinkmanFFS (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was feeling depressed and got very, very drunk. This evening, I was feeling equally desperate, and ended up having to get my special dildo removed from my asshole at the hospital. FML

#20051425
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11871) - you deserved it (34999)

On 08/31/2012 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by pride? what's that? :( (woman) - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)

Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML

#20043181
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27117) - you deserved it (3663)

On 08/26/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about being super heroes. He said I could be "The Period" because I'm a bitch. FML

#20040696
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18526) - you deserved it (8138)

On 08/25/2012 at 8:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I was pretty upset, so one of my guy friends offered to comfort me and get some ice cream. Apparently his definition of "comforting" is to feel my tits and try to get me to give him head. FML

#20034633
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32374) - you deserved it (5190)

On 08/21/2012 at 9:59pm - intimacy - by m (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I was pretty upset, so one of my guy friends offered to comfort me and get some ice cream. Apparently his definition of "comforting" is to feel my tits and try to get me to give him head. FML

#20034633
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32374) - you deserved it (5190)

On 08/21/2012 at 9:59pm - intimacy - by m (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, after his second week of babysitting, my boyfriend has begun the disturbing habit of saying, "Ready or not, here I come!" every time he's about to orgasm. He doesn't see why this doesn't appeal to me. FML

#20032910
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25472) - you deserved it (2773)

On 08/20/2012 at 11:02pm - intimacy - by majorlyturnedoff (woman) - United States



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