kdm_km1

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Offline (the 06/09/2016 at 1:46am)

kdm_km1

15Fucked!

kdm_km1
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 December 1984 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4880
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About kdm_km1 : I try to make each day as I intresting as I can, but work makes that hard sometimes. That said, I spend my free time playing sports, hunting/fishing, and hanging out with friends. Anything else you want to know just ask 😊

kdm_km1's page activity

Visits<b>Kayloe</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 1:25am<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 5:15pm<b>aimeeowl</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 9:12pm<b>grifmelo</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 4:29pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 03/25/2016 at 3:14am<b>madissin</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 1:39am<b>kkorn051212</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 11:18pm<b>aha_awkward_</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 2:57am<b>Jude64</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 4:41am<b>Jennaaay</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 11:53am<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 4:20pm<b>missa8604</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 10:02pm<b>dcs00</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 5:40pm<b>nyf137</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 11:11pm<b>ohmissjane</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 9:10am<b>charmingdisaster</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 7:19pm<b>Kitty1811</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 4:57pm<b>idefka</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 11:13pm

Fucked!<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 11:14pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 11:20pm<b>kkorn051212</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 5:18am<b>dcs00</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 11:40pm<b>aha_awkward_</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 5:09am<b>js_0508</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 9:30am<b>ohmissjane</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 3:19am<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 6:44pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 2:11pm<b>asantos4</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 7:36am<b>_jessiepoohe_</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 6:57am<b>FiFiLovee</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 6:12am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 7:50pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 12:52am<b>TypicalDaniela</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 9:34pm

kdm_km1's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of kdm_km1's badges

kdm_km1's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend, his response was, "I'll start watching pregnant porn to build up an attraction to it." FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2014 at 1:24am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had to rush my 14-year-old son to the hospital after he fell out of a tree while trying to take an obnoxious "extreme selfie". FML

by derped-out sperm / 04/01/2014 at 5:41pm / Ireland / Kids

Today, I left a message for a potential employer. It wasn't until after I'd hung up that I realized I'd given them their own phone number to call me back at. Not getting that job. FML

by kenzamee / 03/04/2014 at 9:39am / United States (Oregon) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went on a blind date. The first thing the guy did was ask if I knew what it felt like to have spiders crawl out of my vagina. FML

by riiiight / 01/29/2014 at 5:14pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, my boyfriend finally succeeded in unhooking my bra with one hand, excitedly exclaiming, "Boobies be free!" FML

by freed / 01/29/2014 at 12:13am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

by sabz21 / 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm / United States (Connecticut) / Work

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. After a while, he started staring at my lady parts, and said my "vag looks like a mockingjay". He then stretched the lips apart like wings and made little "CA-CAW CA-CAW!" sounds. FML

by Goodyear / 01/19/2014 at 10:59pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend started whispering "blowjobbbb" into my ear while we were watching a movie. When I asked him what he was doing, he denied ever saying it and claimed it must have been a subliminal message in the movie. FML

by Subliminal message / 01/19/2014 at 6:21pm / Switzerland / Intimacy

Today, I was painting cabinets for the children's area in my church. While painting, I dropped my brush and got black paint on a white part. I tried to wipe it off. Now there's a very visible smudge that looks like a penis. FML

by peepeepainter / 01/06/2014 at 9:25pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I got a text from my girlfriend. After only having sex once, where I wore a condom and didn't even get to come, she says that she's pregnant. FML

by fuckmuppeter512 / 01/04/2014 at 5:26pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend wrote me a long poem that ended with, "Please don't get another mister / I regret I screwed your sister". FML

by notakeeper / 01/02/2014 at 10:50pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me that sometimes my nipples taste like onions. FML

by Snufflopagus / 01/01/2014 at 8:26am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was watching TV with my husband, and he started getting frisky. When the commercial break started, we started having sex. When he came, there were still two commercials left before the show resumed. FML

by erjazo / 12/31/2013 at 4:19pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I went to a nativity play. My husband showed up late and drunk, and I had to explain to him why booming "Yeah! Time to get baby Jesus up in this shit!" when our son was about to go on stage got us kicked out. FML

by bastard / 12/22/2013 at 4:28pm / United States / Kids