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kdm_km1

Offline (the 03/29/2015 at 7:52am) | Search for a member

kdm_km1

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 25 December 1984 (30 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3386
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About kdm_km1 : I'm awesome. Just ask me.

kdm_km1's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 2:50pm<b>kjax</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 1:04am<b>xanneuhjj</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 5:13pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 6:31am<b>LiveDreamsG</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 12:20am<b>hekinokuroihi</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 11:37pm<b>milanUBC</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 5:54pm<b>1PersonIsMyWorld</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 5:47pm<b>kibster9</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 11:19am<b>Ashd09</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 11:19am<b>Ghosty546</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 10:57am<b>lovethatstach</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 10:45am<b>DaggNabbit</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 10:10am<b>ChaoticPenguin86</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 7:13am<b>upsetpastry</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 6:25am<b>roman11</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 6:08am<b>brewmasterg</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 4:26am<b>fenixfim</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 3:45am

Liked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 7:50pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 12:52am<b>TypicalDaniela</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 9:34pm

kdm_km1's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of kdm_km1's badges

kdm_km1's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I had 'car sex'. It sucked and resulted in him masturbating into a McDonald's bag. FML

#21335578
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30155) - you deserved it (5908)

On 01/12/2015 at 2:56am - intimacy - by briiiiiiii123 - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend sent me a screenshot of his phone's contact list, to show me the adorable photo of us he'd set as my contact image. I guess he didn't realize that a contact called "Side Babe" was just barely in the screenshot too. FML

#21325257
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35449) - you deserved it (2471)

On 12/27/2014 at 11:54am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, as I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, she started doing stupidly fake moaning, which then went really high-pitched like a little girl's, killing my hard-on. She says she thought that because I'm Japanese-American, I'd only be able to cum if she copied "those Japanese pornstars". FML

#21317298
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37082) - you deserved it (3757)

On 12/14/2014 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by dating a moron (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

#21265910
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44309) - you deserved it (7526)

On 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

#21260355
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41389) - you deserved it (4351)

On 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm - love - by HappilyNeverAfter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad picked me up from school, something he'll be doing while my broken leg heals. He thought it'd be hilarious to arrive early and ask the staff where his "crippled" son was, loudly saying I'd broken my leg in a "masturbation-related accident". FML

#21259401
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38354) - you deserved it (3348)

On 09/16/2014 at 12:18pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I asked my husband to tell me something nice about myself. He thought for a few moments, then said, "Uh, you shit quietly." FML

#21239720
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34273) - you deserved it (5694)

On 08/17/2014 at 12:40pm - love - by ugh thanks - United States (Ohio)

Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

#21234106
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52438) - you deserved it (6856)

On 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by jackie89 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, I had to go to the hospital to get blood taken. The nurse mentioned how pronounced and easy to see my veins are. I guess that explains why she missed five times in a row. I'm surprised my arm doesn't look like a heroin addict's right now. FML

#21222027
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37513) - you deserved it (2741)

On 07/27/2014 at 12:13pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML

#21165062
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42838) - you deserved it (6231)

On 06/06/2014 at 3:00pm - work - by confusing (man) - Zimbabwe

Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML

#21154464
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48161) - you deserved it (5755)

On 05/28/2014 at 10:21am - love - by needanotherbed - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

#21133982
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63960) - you deserved it (8110)

On 05/08/2014 at 9:55am - love - by STOP (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had just sat down in the lobby of my doctor's office when my phone alerted me that I had a friend request. I checked; it was from some girl from high school. I muttered to myself, "I don't want to be your friend." I then heard a gasp. She was sitting across from me. FML

Today, at my wedding, my husband stood up to give a speech. It started out beautiful, until he told everyone how he started to fall in love with me after I blew him on our first date. FML

#21118892
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54194) - you deserved it (13440)

On 04/21/2014 at 11:43am - intimacy - by Sue Ellen (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend, his response was, "I'll start watching pregnant porn to build up an attraction to it." FML

#21110801
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52667) - you deserved it (7747)

On 04/12/2014 at 1:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States



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