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kayloh20

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kayloh20

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 16 February 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 629
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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kayloh20's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad made me deliver a welcoming cake to our new neighbors. While I was making small-talk, I saw him climb over their backyard fence. A minute later, he climbed back over, with a plastic deck-chair in hand. I feel like an accessory to the pettiest theft in history. FML

#19205333
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23129) - you deserved it (1901)

On 03/02/2012 at 9:24pm - misc - by wtf dad (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML

#19174199
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35006) - you deserved it (5312)

On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom

Today, I got a text from my mom saying, "I heard the cupcake store got robbed. Where are you?" Then she texted back, "Oh never mind, they wanted money, not cupcakes. It wasn't you." Very funny, Mom. FML

#19062994
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23956) - you deserved it (4520)

On 02/13/2012 at 2:09am - misc - by cieee - United States (Texas)

Today, I explained to my dad that I think I have a vaginal infection. I asked if he could take me to the doctor. He responded by saying, "Just shove some ice up there. It'll go away." FML

#18850090
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30588) - you deserved it (3393)

On 01/19/2012 at 12:14am - health - by hurts.to.pee - United States

Today, this girl I liked made her Facebook status "Nobody texts me anymore, message me numbers?" I commented that I texted her. She deleted it and changed it to "Nobody that I care about texts me anymore, message me numbers?" FML

#18811640
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37880) - you deserved it (3406)

On 01/15/2012 at 1:24am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I have never read any of the Harry Potter books. FML

#18781684
529 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30051) - you deserved it (53431)

On 01/12/2012 at 12:36am - love - by Nate (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML

#18693659
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33892) - you deserved it (5270)

On 01/03/2012 at 2:17am - intimacy - by Cpt Colin (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my friends and I were having a conversation about which mythical creature would be the most unlikely to exist in the real world. They all collectively agreed that it would be a girl who is attracted to me. FML

#17856112
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33086) - you deserved it (4453)

On 09/28/2011 at 3:26pm - love - by Unluckiest Guy of the group (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, a man punched me for sleeping with his wife. Bewildered, I insisted I would never sleep with a married woman, to which he retorted "She wasn't my wife when it HAPPENED, dumbass!" I was assaulted for sleeping with my own girlfriend three years ago. FML

#17848518
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46488) - you deserved it (3580)

On 09/27/2011 at 3:53pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I met an old friend from high school and his hot girlfriend. I jokingly said she must be blind to go out with him. His response: "Yeah, she is." FML

#17728499
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18813) - you deserved it (32288)

On 09/12/2011 at 3:25pm - misc - by aru9 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it was my first day on the job as a first grade teacher. One student pushed another, so I asked him to apologize. His response? "If you boss me around, I'll tell Daddy you touched me somewhere you shouldn't have." I think I'm now this kid's slave. FML

#17615072
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34712) - you deserved it (3372)

On 08/29/2011 at 7:59pm - kids - by slavelaborsux (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML

#17190246
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37079) - you deserved it (10686)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm - love - by John (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML

#17190246
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37079) - you deserved it (10686)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm - love - by John (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

#17156963
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37278) - you deserved it (3287)

On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by putting a post-it note on my locker that said "consider yourself dumped". FML

#16738508
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36465) - you deserved it (4233)

On 06/19/2011 at 1:01am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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