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kay729's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 01/04/2011 at 9:49am / United States (Vermont) / Animals
by Anonymous / 12/04/2010 at 8:28pm / United States (Nevada) / Love
Today, whilst driving to the store, an idiot driver found it to be okay to drive ridiculously fast in below freezing temperatures on the ice and snow. As he passed my car, I angrily gave him the finger. And then I realized I was wearing mittens. FML
by Anonymous / 11/25/2010 at 12:24am / United States (Washington) / Transportation
by Luke / 08/05/2010 at 1:00pm / United Kingdom (West Berkshire) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/29/2010 at 1:34pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, fifteen minutes after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that you're smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick out of your mouth and then it's good if you have something interesting to say." Check please. FML
by Hate2Date / 04/05/2010 at 1:14am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
Today, I made a batch of "special" brownies for a party I was going to tonight. I wrapped them up and put them on the counter with a note that said DO NOT EAT. Later on I came home from some errands to find a tray of half eaten brownies and my ten year old sister passed out on the couch. FML
by badsister / 01/10/2010 at 10:37am / United States (Illinois) / Health
by nomorepetbird / 01/05/2010 at 10:30pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
by epiiphany / 12/16/2009 at 6:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was talking to this guy I like. He's very private and hides all his photos and wall posts on Facebook. Or so I thought, turns out he has me on a restricted friends list, titled "Creepers." FML
by creeper / 12/14/2009 at 12:03am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I received my camera in the mail. I had sent it back to the company because it wouldn't turn on. As I was reading the note they put in, it said, "Battery was put in backwards. No other problems found." FML
by her0x3her0ine617 / 12/09/2009 at 1:12pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, at my work, I was ringing though a kid's purchase. I try to be friendly with the kids and when he handed me his cash I said "Thank you, sir!" in a playful manner. He then turns to his mom and says "Mom, why does everyone think I am a boy?". FML
by DeeElleGee / 11/13/2009 at 7:09pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
Today, I was watching a movie with my sister, my roommate, and my girlfriend. Half way through the movie, my girlfriend left the room and texted me that she was breaking up with me. She then came back in the room, sat on my bed, and enjoyed the rest of the movie with us. FML
by Small_Fry_Hero / 10/21/2009 at 2:39am / United States (California) / Love
by dumbass / 10/01/2009 at 4:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/25/2009 at 8:52pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
- Today, at 11:30 p.m., after a 5-hour train journey to get back to Paris carrying a suitcase that’s… Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was… Today, returning home, I found my roommate trying one of my bras. When he saw my shocked face, the…