Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

kawaiianime

Search for a member

kawaiianime
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 25 February 1995 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 1220
  • Number of comments : 73
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About kawaiianime : Hiya ;)

I want to tell you first off that I love music. Its practically my life; i'm a dancer and live for ballet. I like Owl City and Adele, they're both amazing. I will hunt you down if u tlk lik ths. thres a rson y we hve vwls! Grammar nazi's scare the sh!t out of me xD (I love MCR too~) I'm a sucker for long black hair on guys. x) if you can make me laugh, you already stole my heart.

kawaiianime's last visitors

coleh1998kpetrovskilennelleongDisappearingRoseWeiXinLunhaylburglexxiii

kawaiianime's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of kawaiianime's badges

kawaiianime's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

#17128085
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33180) - you deserved it (8187)

On 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to do a "damage report" on myself after going to the midnight premiere of Harry Potter. As I was waiting for the previews, a 20 year old man dressed as a house elf tackled and wrestled me for my seat. FML

#17121994
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24380) - you deserved it (4579)

On 07/15/2011 at 1:01pm - health - by beachbumb8538 - United States

Today, I came home to my mom dancing the hustle naked. With a group of 4 friends. FML

#17117147
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33858) - you deserved it (3127)

On 07/15/2011 at 2:25am - intimacy - by SCREWED (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my parents think that I don't realize all the sexual euphemisms in their conversations. One of the more recent ones being made by my dad at the dinner table: "This sausage is great, honey, but mine is bigger and tastier!" FML

#17094831
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36783) - you deserved it (2725)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:16pm - intimacy - by wittlegirl - United States (California)

Today, my best friend told me to face my fear of cows and hop over the fence in with them. This resulted in me being chased by a raging cow, and thrusting myself head first over a fence. FML

#17087035
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19993) - you deserved it (13493)

On 07/12/2011 at 11:13pm - animals - by MooCow - United States (Montana)

Today, I was walking down the street to go to the movies, when I got punched in the back of the head. When I turned around, a stranger said, "HAHA! It's punch a random person day!" When I asked him why he chose me, he replied "You're ugly." FML

#17080145
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31956) - you deserved it (3522)

On 07/12/2011 at 12:46pm - misc - by ManInPain (man) - United States

Today, I updated my facebook status to, "Party at my house this Friday. Like my status if you want to come." After about 3 hours I checked back to discover that the only person who'd liked my status was my grandma. FML

#17074594
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33109) - you deserved it (8770)

On 07/12/2011 at 12:40am - misc - by _Emilyy - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

#17044811
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34957) - you deserved it (4836)

On 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm - money - by Lame (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the park with a girl I like. She got playful and climbed a tree, insisting I come up, too. While we were sitting and enjoying the view, she suddenly knocked me off the branch, sending me crashing to the ground. FML

#17044737
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32313) - you deserved it (5490)

On 07/09/2011 at 8:13pm - love - by wolf boy - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my drunk father chased me down the street with my little brother's light saber screaming, "Come back Yoda! Teach me how to use the force!" FML

#17023204
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30936) - you deserved it (3405)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:23am - misc - by Yoda (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was watching a home video of when my mom was pregnant with me. She had a beer in her hand. FML

#16966151
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39365) - you deserved it (3147)

On 07/03/2011 at 10:02pm - health - by wastedbaby - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my son called me from medical school, asking for a new phone. Why? Because he dropped it in the toilet. How? Trying to videotape his anus while taking a dump. I pay $80,000 a year just to hear he took a dump on his phone. FML

#16966057
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33851) - you deserved it (5011)

On 07/03/2011 at 9:50pm - intimacy - by WasteOMoney - United States (Texas)

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

#16950938
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9678) - you deserved it (41817)

On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried to comfort my daughter who'd been crying non-stop for hours. She thinks Chuck Norris is coming to kill her, and I can't convince her otherwise. FML

#16936128
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31305) - you deserved it (4492)

On 07/01/2011 at 1:42pm - kids - by parenting sucks - United States (New York)

Today, the driver's side window of my car was busted, and inside was a note that said, "Sorry, thought this was my car." FML

#16932864
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30398) - you deserved it (1995)

On 07/01/2011 at 4:31am - misc - by Rick - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: