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kavemann

Offline (the 09/21/2014 at 8:51am) | Search for a member

kavemann

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  • Number of visits : 302
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kavemann's page activity

Visits<b>Superdouchebag</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 3:46pm

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kavemann's favorite FMLs

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with a ring from Kay Jewelers. She saw the box, started giggling, whispered, "'Kay", and then started laughing so hard at her joke she had to excuse herself. FML

#21250887
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43610) - you deserved it (5275)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by very punny (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41627) - you deserved it (7856)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while finally about to make love with my long term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML

#21249014
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44442) - you deserved it (4468)

On 08/31/2014 at 11:14am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my 10-year-old son what he wants to be when he grows up. He smiled broadly and said "A porn star!" FML

#21237548
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38185) - you deserved it (5996)

On 08/14/2014 at 4:44pm - kids - by cahsecuel (woman) - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, I have really painful pimples on my upper lip. I'm a professional trombonist, and every note causes excruciating pain. FML

#21220657
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37501) - you deserved it (4488)

On 07/25/2014 at 10:06pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML

#21207158
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42399) - you deserved it (7007)

On 07/12/2014 at 4:19pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I decided to bring down a very old fan from the attic. I plugged it in, and as soon as I turned it on, tiny spiders were blown all over my room. FML

#21206028
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45658) - you deserved it (16193)

On 07/11/2014 at 1:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my wife bought a strap-on. I'm about fifty miles beyond terrified. FML

#21184387
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57379) - you deserved it (7981)

On 06/22/2014 at 4:34pm - intimacy - by possibly fucked (man) - Portugal (Lisboa)

Today, my boyfriend once again cancelled a date because he has too much homework. His professor is my dad, who's assigning astronomical amounts of homework to keep us from seeing each other. FML

#21180214
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56002) - you deserved it (4426)

On 06/19/2014 at 1:28am - love - by professorsdaughter - United States (Washington)

Today, my university considered it an "embarrassment" that I was going to be the first and only person to graduate from my engineering course, so they gave free passes to two guys who hadn't finished their thesis yet. They were congratulated in the newspaper; I wasn't. FML

Today, my daughter admitted why her grades, which are usually straight A's, have been slipping the past few weeks. Turns out she has been deliberately failing tests to avoid becoming valedictorian, so she won't have to deliver a speech at graduation. FML

#21148414
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49064) - you deserved it (6062)

On 05/22/2014 at 3:24pm - kids - by stillaproudfather (man) - United States

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

#21140956
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32695) - you deserved it (52385)

On 05/15/2014 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by FLIPmcCOOL - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I realised the only preparation I've done for my final French exam has been wanking off to French porn. FML

#21135849
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22727) - you deserved it (53362)

On 05/10/2014 at 4:52pm - intimacy - by vivelawank - United Kingdom

Today, I was bored at work, so I started browsing the Internet. While I was on my Facebook page, my boss tagged me in a status: "I've been standing behind you for ten minutes." FML

#21134321
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22218) - you deserved it (46138)

On 05/08/2014 at 7:46pm - work - by notbrowsingnow (man) - United States



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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