Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About katertott : I'm one of those lurkers who waited years before creating an account.
I'm here for the badges! :P
You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?
Today, we got a new Roomba. I set it to clean and came back an hour later to find shit smears all over the floor. Apparently, one of my cats had done his business in the kitchen, and the Roomba had dragged it around the entire first floor of my house. FML
Today, while putting a water bottle into the fridge, I suddenly had to sneeze. The force of my sneezing propelled my head against the open fridge door, causing a gushing wound to my forehead. Bless me. FML
Today, my husband felt dishonoured: his darling little girl, the love of his life, whom he's always considered pure, turns out to be pregnant. He's now warned her: she's grounded and that whoever did this to her had better not come hanging round the house. Pussy, two years old, is now housebound until her kittens are born. FML
Thursday 23 April 2015