About karo_mit_k : I like America. I really do. But partying is just so much better in Germany. Example: All you can drink at Nachtcafe 2nite. Auf geht's, ab geht's 3 Tage wach :D
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Today, I came home in a really good mood, and I greeted my husband with a grin and a "Hi, babe!" He just muttered, "Why can't you just DIE?" and continued playing his video game. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32096) - you deserved it (3717)
On 02/02/2013 at 5:34pm - love - by rani (woman) - Norway (Oslo)
Today, I jokingly asked my girlfriend if she thinks I have a big package. She replied that she didn't want to upset me and get into another fight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18418) - you deserved it (24832)
On 01/29/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by notsobig - United States
Today, I took my new girlfriend to meet my grandmother. We were drinking coffee when my gran leaned to one side and let out a huge fart. Proud of herself, she added, "That one didn't pay his rent on time!" Coffee came out of my girlfriend's nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25418) - you deserved it (3103) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/29/2013 at 2:56pm - love - by jay ze punk - France (Rhone-Alpes)
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
I agree, your life sucks (26056) - you deserved it (2369)
On 01/27/2013 at 12:57am - love - by pdub523 - United States (Texas)
Today, I had lunch with an attractive foreign exchange student from Dresden. After bombarding her with questions about Russia, she smiled and kindly told me that Dresden is in Germany. Everyone laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8865) - you deserved it (38396)
On 01/22/2013 at 6:39pm - love - by Kasey103 (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, while talking to one of my parents' friends, we discovered that the house he grew up in is the same house my boyfriend now lives in. When he recalled that he lost his first tooth there, the only response I could come up with was, "Oh my gosh, I lost my virginity there!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (9362) - you deserved it (35090)
On 01/03/2013 at 5:34am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my mother-in-law, who apparently made a copy of our house key without permission, walked in on my husband and me doing the deed. She went crazy, yelling at me for "defiling" her son. Last week, she yelled at me for not having given her grand-children yet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47975) - you deserved it (3207)
On 12/18/2012 at 12:09pm - intimacy - by daughterinlaw (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, a friend informed me that my dog's name means "penis" in Greek. I live in a predominantly Greek neighbourhood, and apparently I've been screaming for "dong" every evening for the past 3 years. No wonder they don't talk to me much. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25255) - you deserved it (7599)
On 12/18/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by Dog_Lover (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, a friend informed me that my dog's name means "penis" in Greek. I live in a predominantly Greek neighbourhood, and apparently I've been screaming for "dong" every evening for the past 3 years. No wonder they don't talk to me much. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25255) - you deserved it (7599)
On 12/18/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by Dog_Lover (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, it was my wedding day. With my best friend as the priest, she asked, "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?" After saying I do, she then turned to him and asked, "Do you want to bang my friend?" Everyone laughed, except my already disapproving father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21798) - you deserved it (3612)
On 04/23/2012 at 12:04am - love - by gottalovefriends - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I was having a hard time waking up. When I sat down for breakfast, my chair rocked backwards. I reflexively grabbed out at something to hold on to. Unfortunately, I grabbed the cereal box that was on the table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16208) - you deserved it (2681) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/18/2012 at 12:38am - misc - by Fillifilo (woman) - France
Today, I congratulated a bride standing in front of a church in a white dress. Turns out she'd been stood up at the altar. She thrashed me with her bouquet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20024) - you deserved it (3008)
On 04/17/2012 at 6:52am - misc - by Wrongword - China (Shanghai)
Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24556) - you deserved it (1906)
On 04/17/2012 at 5:38am - health - by SeeingLlamas (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I introduced my Spanish friend to a girl I've had a crush on for a long time. Because he only spoke Spanish and she only spoke English, I was the translator. The first thing he said to her was, "You are really pretty." I translated it as "I like other men." Later, they found out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6804) - you deserved it (28880)
On 04/15/2012 at 2:49am - love - by needurlove (man) - United States (Idaho)
Today, I came out to my parents. They still think I'm joking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22631) - you deserved it (4650)
On 04/15/2012 at 12:12am - misc - by Gayeveryday (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Monday 17 June 2013
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