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karen1991

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karen1991
  • Town/Country : Vancouver, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 24 November 1991 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 553
  • Number of comments : 115
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About karen1991 : Hello world my name is Karen! I am 20 with a crazy interesting wonderful and other sorts of life. I love to meet new people and have fun. Music is my coffee without it I am a zombie and not the good kinda zombie ether if there is such a thing, after watching zombie land I don't think so. Save the twinkys!! After watching that movie I ate so many of those yellow delicious bastards..Lol..soooo world send me a message or talk about zombies with me till then Tyler!

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karen1991's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of karen1991's badges

karen1991's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and I asked him to call me something sweet. He called me Honey Boo Boo. FML

Today, I came home to find an almost completely devoured cheesecake, The Notebook playing on the TV, and a shoe thrown at my head. It's safe to say my girlfriend is just about on her period. FML

#20128340
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20927) - you deserved it (4129)

On 10/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by jesushelpme (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

#20128322
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22260) - you deserved it (3161)

On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

#20119984
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19923) - you deserved it (4039)

On 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by L (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, just for old time's sake, I decided to jump on my bed. I ended up hitting my head on the spinning fan and knocking myself unconscious. FML

#20114543
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7872) - you deserved it (25984)

On 10/13/2012 at 2:45am - health - by lalalalainie - United States (California)

Today, as I was about to leave for work, my 16-year-old son stumbled home in nothing but his underwear and pink cowboy boots. He threw his hands in the air, yelled, "BOTTLE SIP BOTTLE GUZZLE," promptly threw up and passed out in it. FML

#20111636
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16110) - you deserved it (2736)

On 10/11/2012 at 2:59am - kids - by Failed Parent - United States

Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML

#20110803
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24255) - you deserved it (3964)

On 10/10/2012 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, at work, my buddy pulled up in his car. I handed him $40, and he handed me a bag. It must have looked like a drug deal, but he was actually just smuggling in the new Pokémon game for me. I'm 22, and a drug deal would probably have been less embarrassing to explain. FML

#20109009
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12759) - you deserved it (5197)

On 10/09/2012 at 12:03pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was consoling my drunk husband as he violently emptied his stomach contents into our toilet. One particular retch made me nauseous, and I vomited all down his back, causing him to turn his head and vomit all over the wall. I got to clean it all up. FML

#20108214
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16514) - you deserved it (3265)

On 10/08/2012 at 9:55pm - love - by hnickell93 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was consoling my drunk husband as he violently emptied his stomach contents into our toilet. One particular retch made me nauseous, and I vomited all down his back, causing him to turn his head and vomit all over the wall. I got to clean it all up. FML

#20108214
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16514) - you deserved it (3265)

On 10/08/2012 at 9:55pm - love - by hnickell93 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, despite having a mild case of the flu, I visited my boyfriend's house and watched a movie with his parents. During the movie, I felt the sudden urge to sneeze. Trying to hold it in, I managed to do the loudest fart I've ever done in my life. Everyone heard. FML

#20107056
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20617) - you deserved it (4575)

On 10/08/2012 at 5:12am - love - by embarrassed (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML

#20104739
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19612) - you deserved it (5068)

On 10/06/2012 at 8:05pm - kids - by TheVirginJenny - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend texted one of her male friends, saying she's turned off by the thought of sex with me. She suggested a bit of "exercise sex" with him. I'm sure he would have eagerly agreed, if he'd been the one receiving the texts. FML

#20104673
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25124) - you deserved it (1415)

On 10/06/2012 at 7:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML

#20098468
393 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26503) - you deserved it (1821)

On 10/02/2012 at 3:39pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom screeched at me about my pillowcase being dirty and finished off one long rant with an irate "Who raised you to be such a pig?" Her anger multiplied by ten when I asked if it was a trick question. FML

#20098049
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14594) - you deserved it (4957)

On 10/02/2012 at 6:29am - misc - by kira (woman) - United States



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